All The Ocracies | Episode 293

All right, you guys, podcast time.

We got the equipment and the perfect business plan.

Give our show away for free and tell no one how to find it.

Ready?

I'm gonna start a podcast that has no focus, and it'll take up an inordinate amount of time.

How's everybody doing?

This is one very, very tired.

John Domingo.

Oh, my God.

I've got.

I'm running about three hours sleep.

How much coffee?

You know what?

No coffee cups.

No coffee.

I'm Donald Trump in it.

I'm diet coking it.

Today, I had about five Diet Cokes.

I don't know if you've noticed, but I have my Super Bowl 59.

How did you get this champion hat on today?

Thank you, Amazon.

My daughter went out to the stores where they already have all the merch, and she says, do you want a hat?

I said, do I?

Do I?

Do.

I do.

I want a hat.

That's right, ladies and gentlemen, your Philadelphia Eagles is Super Bowl 59 champs, and I'm here for it.

And then afterwards, like Philadelphians do, we went down.

I went out, and we did a lot of damage.

We rioted.

We set fires.

We shot people in the eye with fireworks.

Tore down light posts.

Tore down light posts.

We're gonna get into some of that.

I don't know what the fucking light post did.

They tore them down.

And then.

And not only that, but the stadium was taken over by Eagles fans.

It was like a home game.

And the ones that couldn't get into the game were all over Bourbon Street.

Well, they also had it in.

In Philly.

They had it in the convention center.

Oh, I didn't know that.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Okay.

Well, and then they also have Xfinity Live, which is down there by the stadiums.

It's a big place where they're all.

Standing outside watching the game.

And every bar in the Philadelphia area, South Jersey area, we all.

They were all having it.

I watched it by myself.

I watched it at home, too.

Well, to be honest with you, it was.

I don't want to be driving home late.

Well, it's all the other drunks as you got to worry about.

I'm okay, but I know there's some.

Yeah.

More on.

That's going to be, like, super celebratory, and then I'm gonna crash into them or something.

What a game.

Oh, thanks.

If you're an Eagles fan, that's was the most amazing game I've ever seen in my entire life.

I mean, it was a good game.

I have to.

I have to say that not Speaking not as an Eagles fan, although I was cheering for them.

It seemed like the whole team had it together.

Like they were in sync the entire way.

Like there's a couple little snafus here and there, but nothing terrible.

That was nothing that they couldn't recover from.

Good old fashioned Philly ass whooping.

Yeah, it kind of was.

So then I get a message on tick tock because I put up an Eagles thing after we.

After I got done, I did an Eagles tick tock where I.

Shocking.

Okay.

I sang no one likes us.

No one likes us.

No one likes us.

We don't care.

That song.

And then Adam from Phil, we.

No one likes us.

We don't care.

Right.

It's almost like a Jersey song, except it's Philly.

Exactly.

So Adam says, Eagles didn't win that game.

The Chiefs lost the game.

Now I'm like, what the does that mean?

You know what?

Let me just say something.

Let me gear up and fight.

Here's the deal.

The Philadelphia defense came out there and fucking manhandled that team.

I mean, and then.

And it's.

Patrick Mahomes had no one to throw to.

Our secondary blanketed them.

They didn't get across the 50 yard line until the third quarter.

They had like 17 yards in the first half.

We had more points by the halftime than they had offensive yards.

Yep.

Okay.

I think they had like two first downs in the whole first half.

And you know, I was just.

Dropped the ball a few times too.

Like.

Like ridiculously.

They shouldn't.

Yeah, I get that.

Well, there's a couple.

One guy was wide open.

Yeah, he did.

He dropped the ball and he's like.

All right, so I got a couple videos here.

First I want to see, like.

Sorry, folks, listening.

How dare you, first of all, watching a video.

One of the.

Wait a minute.

It's.

It's more audio, but I have.

Okay, I should say that I have some.

What would I call it?

I have some.

Now you got me all fucked up.

I have some kind of video audio combination thing I think you'll like.

There we go.

All right, so first is.

I love the predictions of other people.

This is what.

This is what I love.

Here we go.

As a Cowboys fan, this is a prediction I really don't want to have to give because the Eagles are in the super bowl.

And while I don't want the Eagles.

To win, I'm going to give you.

A real super bowl prediction.

Okay.

When I look at big time games like this, I look at three main things.

Oh, what are they?

I Look at experience.

Because you're in the Super Bowl.

Okay?

I look at who has the better head coach.

You know something?

I wonder how this Dallas fan does.

Because I'm looking at this gentleman and he probably wasn't even alive the last time the fucking Dallas Cowboys were in the fucking Super Bowl.

Bowl.

He's not wrong there.

Right?

All right, so, okay, better head coach Andy Reid.

Okay?

And who has the better quarterback?

And when you boil all three of.

Those things down, it's not the Cowboys.

There's only one answer, baby.

There's only one answer, baby.

There's only one answer, baby.

Yeah.

Welcome to the Red Kingdom.

That's terrible.

I get it.

I mean, I.

I understand it.

He's a Cowboys fan.

He will never root for the Phillies or for the Eagles.

I get it.

Ever.

I get it.

So that's why.

Because he's stupid.

Yeah.

And I.

I was nervous all the way into the.

Late into the third quarter.

I know they were beating them like, I think they were beating them 34 to 6 or something like that.

Yeah.

And once we got into the fourth quarter, I'm like, all right, they can't come back now.

They.

They can't come back, but could they?

Well, now, now listen.

Patrick Mahomes came in there and threw two touchdowns against our second second string defense.

All right?

They pulled the starters out.

They figured, let's put the other guys in, let them play in the Super Bowl.

We were beaten.

Beating him to death.

And he got two touchdowns.

We.

Okay, here's me.

I'm not just saying.

I told you I'm a little touchy today.

Here's the play of the game.

This is the.

This is the play of the game that I almost had a heart attack on.

This is when Cooper de Jean, 22 years old.

He's younger than my twins.

His 22nd birthday.

Yeah, it's on his birthday.

He's in the Super Bowl.

Cute.

Really.

He's a baby.

Patrick Mahomes drops back.

They're chasing him.

He slings the ball, and then this happens.

First down.

You didn't just do that, Patrick.

He throws.

Interception.

Get there.

Oh, my.

That was a Chiefs fan, by the way.

That was a Chiefs fan.

Shut up.

That was.

Yeah, so I thought I had another one in here.

So Budwugger says play the game.

Was Kenny Pickett with the victory Victory formation.

Yeah, I know.

What a.

They should have pulled him out and had Hertz go in for the last one.

No, they just let him.

Oh, why would you give it to Kenny Picket for that?

Oh, because he's not going to be here next year, I don't think.

Hopefully get rid of him.

Well, I got his participation ring, so.

Good job, buddy.

Yeah.

Here's the pick.

This is it.

They're calling.

This is the call of the game.

Like the Tom Brady and the other guy, right?

This is the pick.

Third and 16.

Mahomes rolling out, looking, firing, intercepted.

Picked up by Cooper.

DeJean gets a block.

Dean is in.

Touchdown.

Wow.

Wow.

Gani almost laid an eg.

So excited.

I know.

I.

I gotta tell you, just watching that again, I got goosebumps all over again.

I.

I got goosebumps.

How many times have you watched that play?

It had to been two dozen times.

At least 10 times I've watched it today.

Today, today, today.

I.

I can't.

Because there's all different.

Like, they have that, then they have the end zone where he's coming in from the end zone, and then they got the.

With the music behind it.

With a cooperation.

Cooper Jean is not a safety.

He's a lockdown.

So Tom Brady with the award.

Wow.

Yeah, I know.

Okay, so can we pause on this and talk about Tom Brady for just a moment?

Sure.

How much surgery has he had?

He has not one wrinkle in his brow.

His jawline is incredibly sculpted.

Yeah.

And that dent in his chin seems a little more pronounced.

Oh, you know what that is?

They're just not feeding him.

What's his butt chin?

That's a.

That's his belly button.

He's had so much skin pulled up, his dick's right around his.

His neckline.

That's not his Adam apple.

That's his balls.

Bruce says you've used a whole jar of Vaseline today.

I have not.

But I know that they were greasing the poles.

I know they were greasing the poles over in Philly.

And I said, oh, I'm sure there's a lot of poles being greased in Philly after this win.

Jody says 3/4 of domination, pretty much.

They put the second string in in the fourth quarter.

Yes.

Yes.

Nobody's.

Nobody's freaking out about it.

If the Eagles wanted you, it makes it sound like he was coming back.

We're coming back.

There was trash.

Garbage touchdowns.

You gotta calm down.

Nobody's bashing them.

You're just getting.

If they left the fucking first team out there, he wouldn't even have got them.

He'd have probably got sacked like nine more times.

His offensive line domination.

You have to admit, the first three were.

Oh, yeah.

So they slid a little bit in the fourth.

It doesn't matter.

They didn't, it's not like they gave up the win.

They still got the dub, so it doesn't matter.

Relax.

I, I, you know what?

I'm offended by the term slid.

They didn't slide.

They, they just didn't stomp.

They marched.

Yes, yes.

And then they put their second team in and they, you know, it's no sense of making, running the score up to 60 something, you know.

Jody, I'm trying to defend you here.

But he's just, well, it's ridiculous.

It's not like they were coming back.

Okay?

Nobody has said that.

Okay.

All right.

Just saying.

I know.

You really don't need to defend it.

It's okay.

And then Philadelphia fans that were down in, in New Orleans, they were there for a couple of days, spreading around the Philly money and the waitresses were very happy with, with Eagles fans.

I don't give a fuck about football, but let's just say I work at a very popular New Orleans establishment.

I just want to let you all know, fuck the Chiefs, because every single one of those bitches has been a.

Shitty ass motherfucking tipper.

Go Birds.

They be tipping.

They be tipping well because they know.

What it's like to work for a living.

Now you know what it is?

I've started.

I'm a sore winner.

It's the fact that, no, they make it sound like the Chiefs were even in the game.

We pull our, we pulled the first team out and let the second team go in and, you know, and then Patrick Mahomes is, is throwing, thrown against our second, our second team.

D.

Okay, they couldn't get across the, they couldn't get across the 50 yard line until the third quarter.

Just saying.

Whoops.

Okay, didn't want that.

Not being a sore winner, but I'm certainly not going to be sitting here taking any kind of nonsense, I'll tell you that right now.

Nobody's abusing your team.

All right?

Yet.

Hey, Aaron, how are you?

For any of your, any of you Bills fans out there, as a lifelong Buffalo Bills fan, after watching this game tonight, I'm going to do the one respectful thing I think I can do.

I'm totally jerking off to the Eagles logo.

Go Bills.

Go Bills.

Go Bills.

But yeah, it was, it was great.

I'll tell you, when he intercepted that ball, I just, I mean, you could just, you could almost feel the, the ground shake in the area.

Everybody was like freaking out.

What am I doing here?

Another hurricane.

You're losing your mind because yeah, I'm not.

Listen, folks can be a lot of mistakes.

Tonight.

I'm just about delirious telling you that right now.

Just about.

Just about delirious.

There's one there.

Here's one.

Here's one issue.

Apparently we can't spell.

And I don't understand this, but again, they're out there.

I guess this was game day.

Before this, before the.

It was pregame.

They were out on the streets.

Here's another Eagles fan.

You want to leave the chat with your people?

Go ahead, spell it.

E, A, G, E, L.

Eagles.

Michael, we're going to work on a spelling lesson for these Eagle fans.

Man.

That's the second time publicly this week I've heard it spelled wrong.

Yeah, I know.

I get it.

Don't you have a song?

Yeah, we do.

Kind of like the ABC song.

Yeah, but, you know, you notice what's happening.

Let me.

Let me just back this up for the people that are watching.

I guess they could sing it.

So see, the gentleman that.

Well, you can't see it if you're listening, but there's a gentleman here and let me just say he's.

And that seemed to be the same problem we had with the mayor.

Mayor was also.

So you're saying because they're black, they can't smell?

That's what I'm saying.

Okay.

That's exactly what I'm saying.

You can just literally say it.

Well, I thought it was funnier to do it this way.

Okay.

And then probably good, lucky Chiefs fan sound listening.

All right, let's try this again.

Good, lucky Chiefs fans.

That's sound listening to world's game winner Buffalo.

Predictions live stream live in super Bolton.

Wow.

You're still drunk from the other night.

Wow.

Oh, welcome aboard, Lenny.

Welcome aboard.

Dude, you type.

You type like John Reeds.

Yeah, yeah.

Orly.

Jesus Christ.

They're all.

They're all spelled right.

It's just the.

Now they weren't.

Put that back up.

The Chiefs were spelled wrong.

Oh, well, it's true.

Chefs.

The chef's fans.

Yeah.

Is it chef's fans sound listening to.

World games, prediction, streaming.

You got everything else right.

All right, Lenny Chiefs, then.

He's fine.

No, three Pete.

No.

I hate this, baby.

So I love this.

The Chiefs.

No, no.

Love that.

That was Patrick Mahomes.

Yeah.

And listen, if it wasn't for.

If.

If it wasn't for them playing the Eagles, I would have been rooting for the Chiefs.

I really would have wanted to see them have a three peat.

I think Patrick Mahomes is An amazing quarterback.

You know, I'm a fan of Travis Kelsey and of course I'm a fan.

I am now a fan of Andy Reid.

He was our coach here for, I don't know, 10 something years.

He took us to a Super bowl and a bunch of NFC championship games.

So, you know, it's a shame.

It's a shame we had to put an ass whooping on them, but, you know.

An ass whooping, I guess.

All right, so shall we get into the real part of the Super Bowl?

The commercials?

That's always about the commercials.

Yeah.

All right, so which ones was your.

Which one was your favorite commercial?

I have a couple.

All right.

Dirk says he ain't the MVP though.

So who's not the mvp?

Mahomes.

Mahomes isn't the.

Okay, did they make the MVP of the league yet?

They don't think they.

They chose the MVP of the league.

Or of the Super Bowl.

The league.

Who was the MVP of the league?

Josh Allen.

Oh, I'm sorry.

The guy didn't make it into the Super Bowl.

That fucking guy.

That guy that gets beat by the fucking Chiefs in the playoffs every.

I don't see your Eagles.

He didn't.

Valuable player.

What the fuck?

You can shit talk him all you like.

So is he in.

Is he in the Super Bowl?

Is he wearing a Super bowl championship hat?

I'm sorry, hold on.

Did he win an AFC championship yet?

Since he's been in the league?

Has he been to a Super bowl yet?

The MVP of the league?

Dirk is so annoyed with you right now.

What the fuck?

What am I out of my mind?

How is he the MVP of the league?

His team didn't make it to the fucking Super Bowl.

Okay?

Hey, you know something?

On my top five of MVP players in the league.

He wouldn't even make the top five.

You got, as far as I'm concerned, Saquon Barkley.

You could make another case for Patrick Mahomes.

I mean, look what he did this year.

I mean, look how many scores.

One score games.

That him.

He ended it really well.

Good job, Josh Allen.

That's a fucking embarrassment.

If I was a Bills fan, I would.

I would.

That's.

That's an embarrassment.

Josh Allen.

Turk said I gave him 20 minutes.

He's still yapping.

I know.

God, he's delicious at this point.

Point.

Ridiculous.

All right, speaking on to the commercials, please.

Yes.

All right, so which.

Which one was your favorite?

There was a few I thought that were really good.

I did like the.

I did like the.

A couple of the Budweiser ones.

I'm a big fan of anything with the Clydesdales, so I was happy the Clydesdale horses were back.

Okay.

I thought that was just cute.

When he rolls that, the keg falls off the truck and he just kind of rolls it.

The young Clydesdale decided he's going to roll it into town and rolled it into a bar.

Yeah, that was cute.

I consider that the Josh Allen of half of super bowl commercials, but go ahead.

I'm sorry.

Your fucking retarded eagles weren't in any commercial then.

Anyway, I like that commercial.

What was your favorite?

Well, my favorite was the.

The Doritos with the alien.

Are they still flying around?

I don't know.

Are they?

I haven't seen any.

And then they're trying to fight over the bag, and when the thing finally pulls out of the bag, it goes and blows up the alien ship.

I like that.

My second favorite one was Shane Gillis in the cul de sac.

That was funny.

That was really good.

Yeah.

It's amazing how Budweiser has pivoted.

Yeah.

So hard from the unwoke ones.

Yes.

All right, so which one.

What was your next one that you liked?

So I did like that one.

The Clyde Zone was cute.

I got a kick.

I don't even drink Mountain Dew.

I don't think I've ever had it with Seal.

Being a seal.

I like that.

It just made me laugh really hard because I'm like, is that Seal?

That Seal is a seal.

That's what he's done, right?

I don't know what he's done since Kiss More Rose.

I'm sure he has a career, but I don't know.

Which one of the supermodels was he banging that married to?

I thought Heidi Clum.

That was Heidi Klum.

That's right.

He was banging Heidi Klum.

I thought that was a good one.

What was another one you had?

There was.

I did like the space aliens one.

I did like the.

Was it Instacart with all the mascots?

That was a good one, too, because.

That was funny, because they show.

When they started, they said, puppy Monkey Baby, and I went, oh, no, we're bringing baby back.

Yeah, I brought that fucking thing back.

But it was just that when they had them all together, which probably was not cheap to do to get all.

Those masks, all those.

Well, yeah, all those trademarked ones.

Yeah.

So that.

That was good.

Some of the ones I was hoping for was a Spuds MacKenzie.

I didn't see a Spuds MacKenzie, but poor Spuds like all the other mascots.

I guess it was mascots, trademarks, whatever.

You would call them, mascots.

It was pretty cool.

And then the other one I really liked was the old ladies, the Weathertech.

That was really funny where the lady yells bingo.

And she turns around and she pulls her top out, lets her big old titties flop out.

That was kind of funny.

And it was very like Thelma and Louise, like the gang, the four of them all like, in the car.

Oh, this.

And.

And you had said on earlier this morning was the lay's potato chip.

Was it?

You had said it.

Or Bruce potato chips with the.

The potato farmer.

I thought that was kind of.

Oh, okay.

Yeah, yeah, it was cute.

It's not like I like a funny in your face commercial.

I'm not like the shocking.

Yeah, so the.

The Clydesdale make you think in the.

Feels, you know, like that.

So the Clydesdale one didn't get in the hearts.

Yeah, it's like, these are for broads.

Those are the ones for broads.

It's like, oh, she planted a potato and it grew.

Oh, broad.

Okay.

Oh, oh, look, the pony jumped the fence and kicked the keg all the way down to the bar.

Oh, look how cute.

Okay.

Yeah, I don't drink Budweiser.

All right.

And then the other one I really thought was good that I didn't really see it.

Didn't get that much play was the Reese Lava cup where they're trying.

That was funny, actually, where they're trying.

To catch the lava and they're trying to stop the people from eating real lava.

My favorite is the lady in the wheelchair, like, rolling down and they pick her up in her wheels.

Burst.

Burst into flames because it's over the heat.

That was so funny.

That was.

Bruce says, oh, now I'm abroad.

Yeah, sorry, Bruce.

Sorry, Bruce.

Well, you are from California.

John thinks anybody who has an abortion is a chick.

You are from California do have a sensitive side.

What do you want from me?

Just say it's not a bro commercial.

Like the, the.

The.

The Reese's Lava cup is a broke.

It made me want to go get a Reese's Lava Cup.

No, it didn't make me want to buy one.

It just laughed.

And then the.

The Bud Light one way me wanted to go have a barbecue out in a cul de sac.

And then the Doritos one wanted me to get a bag of Doritos.

The Budweiser, the horse thing.

Rolling a thing just made me went, oh, all right, what's next?

Okay, I'm just saying.

All right.

Any other ones you hate?

I did not care for the Hellman's one with the Harry Met Sally, the redo.

That was so pathetic.

I was just like.

She wasn't really good at it either.

It wasn't even a really good.

Well, it's.

First of all, it's like, you know, evening tv, but they're not going to put that in there.

But I.

I can't get past Meg Ryan's face.

I know.

It doesn't.

It's a lot of work, like she said.

Some surgery, some great.

Jesus trying to be nice.

She looks like the Joker a little bit.

It's not flattering.

And it just.

It just looked boring.

It wasn't.

Is it like.

It was funny, I guess, in the scene.

All right.

Bruce still thinks she's doable, of course, but.

Okay.

You know, that's what you.

Boat.

That's cool.

Throw a leg over.

I got it.

The other one was.

The one I really like was where the Dodge ran one where the fathers reading the bedtime story, but you don't know he's read a bedtime story.

And.

Oh, with Glenn.

I don't know who the actor was.

Oh, what's his name?

No, I like that one, too.

Yeah, I'm sure you did.

He was cute.

You know what?

There wasn't much boobage in any of this.

It wasn't really any female sexuality in any of these commercials that I can remember.

You know what was one of my.

We did one about breast cancer.

Like, breast cancer.

It was literally boobs.

That's not what I'm talking about.

It's not.

I'm not talking about breast cancer.

I'm talking about, you know.

Oh, like the objectification.

Listen, I'm talking about the objectification of hot women.

That's what I'm talking about.

Sorry, sorry.

Like, remember the old Pepsi commercial where Cindy Crawford and a pair of Daisy Dukes and a white.

A white wife beater comes out and she's trying to put money into the Pepsi machine to get the Pepsi, and as she's drinking the Pepsi.

That'll make you grease your pole, that one.

Something like that.

All right.

Well, I guess Pepsi didn't think objectifying women was the way to sell.

Yeah, like the old days, apparently.

That doesn't work.

Oh, it works.

It still works.

It's just they don't want to do.

It because you buy Pepsi.

I don't like Pepsi.

I like Coke.

So I would buy.

Yeah, I understand that, but what I'm saying is, you know why they can't do these, these sexy commercials with women anymore because of ugly broads.

Ugly broads come out.

You're right.

And they start screaming, we had a meet.

We had a meeting and said no.

Meeting of the ugly broads.

Yeah, yeah, we had a meeting and decided that no more pretty people should be in commercials looking hot.

You put something in the discord where you had a picture of a, of a plain girl and then a girl all made up with the contour and the lips and all that.

Remember that?

You put it in a discord.

Yeah, I remember seeing it.

I don't know if I put it in, but.

Oh, maybe I did.

Okay.

And I'll be honest with you, I like.

Which one would you be interested in?

In the plain Jane girl.

I'm a plain Jane girl.

You know why?

I'll tell you why.

So what if she, if she was made up like a hot, like Cindy Crawford drinking a Pepsi, you would turn her away?

No.

So here's what I'm saying is that women put all that makeup on and shit and all that for women.

We don't really care.

Guys don't really care.

And the reason I say that is if you have like a plain Jane girl and a girl that takes.

There's two different types of girls.

There's a low maintenance girl and a high maintenance girl.

You know the difference between a low maintenance girl and a high maintenance girl?

It's very easy to figure out.

Why don't you tell me what you think it is?

Okay.

I'm glad you asked.

So what happens is if it takes, like if I, if not me, if someone says, hey, let, let's go do something, let's go get ready, let's go do something.

From the time they get, go in to take a shower, get ready.

If it's under an hour, low maintenance, over an hour, high maintenance.

That's depends on what it is.

No, no, John's rules.

Yeah, yeah.

No, no John's rules.

Low maintenance, under an hour.

No, no, I mean makeup, hair, all that shit.

Under an hour.

Okay.

High maintenance, over an hour.

Because I like.

In other words, you wake up on a Saturday morning, if you're out with, if you, if you're, if you're dating a low maintenance girl and you say, look, let's go to breakfast, she grabs her hair, she puts it in a ponytail or a messy bun, throws a cap on or something, throws on some clothes and out the door you go.

And she's fine.

High maintenance girl goes, I got to go get a shower.

She's Doing her hair, she's got to put her face on and all that other stuff.

Some people want to take a shower.

You ain't going to.

You ain't going to go.

You ain't getting the breakfast.

You're going lunch.

Because by the time she gets ready, it's lunchtime.

Well, it's my.

Not my problem.

You've had terrible experience with women who take too long to get ready.

Because that sounds like what that is.

Yeah.

Okay.

I've had both.

I know I can be, I can be out the door within an hour.

Within an hour with a shower when I come back from the gym.

I can be ready within an hour.

That's your low maintenance.

It's fantastic.

Love a low maintenance.

Go.

Flu girls are amazing.

All you get.

This is not much.

No fancy.

I'm just saying there's nothing wrong with that.

That's.

That's fantastic.

And you always look stunning when you go out.

I've seen you.

I've seen pictures of you when you're out about, on out of battle.

Exactly like this.

It's not, that's not true.

Okay.

Anyway.

Yeah.

So I'm just saying.

And then you see these other ones where they've got their nose contoured and all kinds of stuff and they're, they're putting, they're putting stuff, dropping stuff all over the face and they're sponging around.

It's literally change there.

It's.

I'm of two minds of that.

It is impressive to be able to apply that style of makeup.

Right.

It is also a ton of work.

And I don't, personally, I do not have the patience.

I don't care.

Like, if I was going to an event where I needed to dress that much, I would probably go have my makeup professionally done, frankly.

But other than that, this, the makeup I wear for podcasting, for work to go out is probably the same five minute nonsense.

It's not fancy.

It just is what it is.

So.

Yeah, but if there, if there's like a glamour type event, I would have to have my makeup done because I.

Don'T, I don't know, I'll make.

I don't know how to do my makeup any better than this.

I'll make one exception.

One exception is if it's.

You're in a wedding or something and there's going to be a lot of photos.

An event.

Yeah, yeah, that, that.

There's an exception for that.

Where did I see the other day?

I was watching Megyn Kelly went somewhere.

She went to go, oh, it was the day that Megyn Kelly went to Washington for the inauguration.

Okay.

And she's in hair and makeup, and they've got these big, giant rollers in her hair.

Yeah.

Do you think her hair normally looks as gorgeous as it does?

No, but, see, not at all.

She's a.

She's a crossover.

She.

She's the kind of girl, I think, that could throw her hair in a ponytail.

Messy bunny, no makeup, out the door, look pretty good.

But then again, done up looks pretty good, too.

Well, have you seen her not done up?

That's the whole thing.

No, I have not.

I don't know.

She might.

I don't want to say, be unrecognizable, but she may look wildly different.

You think so?

I think there's.

Well, I also think Megyn Kelly's had a lot of work done, which bothers me, because I don't think she looks like she did 10 years ago.

And I think she's entire.

I mean, I think she's entirely too skinny.

She's too skinny.

That.

I'll give you.

She needs a couple sandwiches.

Yes, she does.

Not that I'm critiquing body, because she.

Could put on another.

She.

She could very well.

I think she would look a lot better if she put on, like, £15.

Yeah.

That's all.

I think she could probably stand a little bit more because she looks very pointy.

Everything's sharp.

Yes.

There's no soft spots on her at all.

But, yeah, I.

I think.

I think she would.

It would be someone who probably looks very different without her makeup, and I don't even know.

And so here's the kicker.

You don't know if that's all her hair either, because there's so much in the way of weaves and extensions and things like that.

I.

I would imagine it's.

Anytime I see somebody with their hair below their shoulders, I automatically say they're extensions.

You don't see that anymore.

I don't know.

You know, before we get off the super bowl, one thing I do want to.

There you go.

Derek says she's had a lot of work done.

She looked better before.

Yeah, I agree.

I agree.

Sometimes you can do too much.

Before we get.

We got to talk about Taylor Swift.

End of an error.

It's so bad.

Well, here's the thing.

Poorest Taylor Swift went out to the super bowl, and she's Travis Kelsey's girlfriend, so she is rooting for.

She's rooting for the Chiefs.

Well, you've got a whole damn stadium full of Eagles Fans.

So when they put her up on the.

The big screen, Travertron, whatever it is, the big giant screen, the Eagles fans are going to boo.

Oh, that side eye.

She's just like.

She's like.

She's not used to.

She's never been booed before.

I don't think she's ever, ever been booed in her entire life.

So she sees she's on the big screen, and then she gives it a side eye.

Like, what's going on here?

And you can almost see her right now.

She's going to mouth.

It's like, what's going on?

You know, like, I get it.

Like, all you Eagles fans are stupid and passionate and all, but, like, it's.

She's successful.

I can't.

I can't falter whether I enjoy her music or not.

She clearly is successful.

She's good at what she does.

Enough people like her to make her the.

The star that she is.

And the fact that, you know, she gets put up on the jumbo drum and the Eagles fans are like, boo.

Like, what.

What does that even mean?

Like, what is that?

That's what we do.

Yeah.

We do the other team.

Well.

And again, she grew up outside of Philadelphia in a suburb, like, so it.

Doesn'T mean she has.

Well, she said she was.

Listen.

Fan forever.

She said she was an Eagles fan.

All right?

She.

When she came here, she said she was an Eagles fan.

And Jody Chances.

Tom.

Tom Brady looks like an alien.

He totally does.

Yeah.

But, you know, she went.

So she moved down to Nashville.

Look, she's banging the tight end of the Chiefs.

What do you think she's going to.

She's definitely going to be a Chiefs fan, and his Eagle fans were definitely going to boo her.

That's just the way it is.

That damns the rules.

Okay, well, they would boo.

Well, the whole point is they would probably boo anybody who is not.

Yes.

You know, go.

Go green or go or whatever.

Right.

So.

But the whole thing, they make it.

I think the NFL has also exploited, like.

And she's, you know, profited off of it, too.

But I think they've exploited the.

Out of her.

Every time they pop her image up, all her little fans get excited.

Look, but people are tired of seeing her now.

I.

I disagree.

And here's the other thing.

Really?

Yeah.

She just got booed.

Like.

Well, you think they're happy to see her?

I think I just explained it.

The only reason that she got booed, she was in a stadium full of Eagles fans.

She's a Chiefs fan, and they put her up there and they've been.

The Eagles fans do what we do the best.

We didn't throw a battery at her.

We didn't hit her with a snowball.

We just.

If you could have thrown a battery at her, somebody would have.

Well, I don't know.

I totally do.

So anyhow, so Taylor Swift gets booed and all the Swifties come out, of course.

And they're very upset.

Very upset.

How dare you boo her?

I didn't see it for myself, but if people.

Look, I haven't seen this, but I'm going to be in my car and make a video of it and tell you how I feel about something that might have happened that someone told me about, but I didn't actually see it.

So sit down and shut the fuck up.

She's an.

No one gives a.

About a housewife.

Taylor Swift.

Oh, that's right.

She's one of the housewives.

Real Housewife of New Jersey, actually.

I didn't know that.

Okay, so now I can.

Now I can.

Now I can boo her.

Here we go.

I didn't see it for myself, but if people booed Taylor Swift.

You don't have to be a fan.

A non fan.

What human being booze?

Someone else doesn't.

Eagles fans.

She kidding?

Is she kidding?

She has.

She met her herself.

She's kind of a.

Eagles fans.

I just told you.

Who does this?

Eagles fans do this.

But she's an asshole.

She does dumb.

You know, she.

Yeah, she didn't do anything wrong.

She's a Chiefs fan.

In a stadium for Eagles fans.

I don't.

I don't understand why this is so hard for you people.

That's mean spirited.

It's mean.

Oh, you're from New Jersey.

Shut up.

Of course it's mean.

The future.

Okay.

Oh, she.

Now she's concerned about the young girls as she's on her TV show, exploiting herself.

Which.

Which one was the one.

Thank you.

Which was the one that flipped over the table.

Was this her?

Ah, could be.

She's.

I don't know.

I don't watch those dumb.

Little long in the tooth too.

For our daughters and our daughters.

The future.

Oh, okay.

Yeah.

She's so concerned.

She's concerned about just staying relevant.

That's.

That's all Bethany Frankel is worried about.

She like.

Well, we're the same age, me and Beth.

Good old Bethany.

Oh, really?

Yeah.

She's 54.

Okay.

I feel like I look better.

Like just.

I think she just looks older.

I thought she was older, so.

But she's just annoying.

She's got that Megyn Kelly too thin look.

Oh, she's a founder of Skinny Girl.

Did you ever hear Skinny Girl like, cocktails and food?

Yeah, well, she makes.

She creates, like, Skinny Girl cocktails.

Oh, okay.

Oh, a man who would have.

Bob's gonna be my age in two days.

When will I be?

When will I drink a Skinny Drink, please?

Well, I didn't say you might have drank it, but just.

In fact, you might have heard of it.

Okay.

All right.

We also have another.

Swifty very upset.

I'm not, like, a Taylor Swift fan, but y'all booing her at the super bowl was so mean.

Like, wow.

It was mean.

Oh, you mean y'all.

You booed a billionaire.

Yeah, whatever.

She was so upset that she almost almost cried on her way to her private jet to leave.

One, she didn't ask to be on camera two, do you realize she's a person?

Like, you are weird.

Really?

Is she a person?

Wow.

Of course we realize she's a person.

That's why it was fun to boo her.

Cracks me up.

She is just a person there watching the game.

Like, why would all y'all boo her?

Who cares?

Because she's a Chiefs fan and stadium full of Eagles fans.

You don't want to see her, like, and then don't show her.

Me so sad.

She, like, looked around and she was like, what's going.

Going on?

Like that.

Y'all are shitty people.

Thank you.

All right, I'll take it.

Well, then, you know what?

Blame the.

The film crew for the Super Bowl.

They're the ones that took her, put her up on the jumbo chop.

Why don't you do that?

Why don't you blame her parents for birthing her so she exists?

Like, get over it, princess.

It's life.

Taylor Swift is already over it.

You know what people are talking about today?

Taylor Swift like this, bro.

You know who's not sad about it?

I'm sorry.

Booing Taylor Swift at the Super Bowl.

Like, how old are we?

Who?

How old are we?

How big are her lips?

I know.

And they are all.

She's got some DSLs, doesn't she?

What?

DSLs.

Oh, gross.

Okay.

No, I.

This girl needs to stop inflating her face.

It's just.

Take off those stupid eyelashes.

High maintenance girl right there.

There you go.

That's high maintenance.

Who cares who you like and don't like?

Like, where is your humanity?

This is a human being watching her boyfriend play a game.

Grow up.

Are people.

Well, like, what is going on?

It is really sick.

It's so sick.

She's just there supporting her boyfriend.

Oh, my God.

Just.

She's just a person.

She's a human being.

She didn't ask to be booed.

She has feelings, you know?

God, shut up.

Jody says she's not a person anymore.

She's a brand.

She's a brand.

She's the Taylor Swift.

That's what she is.

And you know what?

She's making a ton of money.

All right, so did you see her?

Thank God they're all white knighting for her today because she certainly couldn't do that for herself.

Did you see her at the game today?

Yesterday?

Did you see her outfit is what I meant to say.

She had shorts and boots on like she always does.

Yeah.

Did she?

I just thought it was a very poor choice.

I thought it was very.

Almost white.

Taylor Swift.

Yeah, but I almost.

It was like trailer Swift.

It was like very trailer trashy, kind of.

You know, for a billionaire, you think she'd be a little bit.

What Travy wanted.

You think Travy wanted?

Well, he was wearing full out.

See what he was wearing.

He looked like he was dressed in a.

In gold lame or some kind of.

1970S zoot suit something or other.

What the are you wearing?

And you know, the best part is he had to leave wearing that.

I know.

He had this weird couture suit.

It was very, very trendy, very on brand or for whatever they're making him out to be.

Did he get more hair, by the way?

His hair's grown out.

Implants?

No, I don't think he did that.

His hair is a lot thicker and lusher than it was a couple years ago, and it's a little darker, so maybe.

Well, I mean, he might have.

I don't know.

It's.

It's.

Dude, it's the Super Bowl.

No one cares.

You can have a helmet on.

I don't know.

He.

He looks a little different as well.

I.

I wasn't a big fan of that creepy mustache he had.

That pedo stash is okay.

Yeah, he doesn't look good in a mustache.

He does look like.

He looks like.

Guys.

It's a porn stache is what it is.

Yeah, it was a porn stash.

Some guys can wear that well, and he wasn't one of them.

Now, now it was like a little sticky, creepy mustache.

I'm a fan of Travis Kelce.

I think.

I think he's a good guy.

I do.

I've.

I've listened.

I've listened to his podcast.

I'VE seen him on other shows.

He seems like a pretty good guy.

He looks dumb.

He looks like he's like.

Well, here's the thing.

You got Jason, who's like the family guy.

He's got the wife, a bunch of kids, and then they got the dumb brother Travis, who's cute, but he looks like he's stupid.

He might be bright.

I'm not saying he is stupid.

He just looks like he's the dumb one.

Like, I don't know, the pretty one, but he's maybe not so.

So smart.

Okay, maybe he is.

I.

I don't know.

That's just the.

I don't want to listen to him because I just don't care.

All right, noted.

Adrenochrome will fix your hair dust.

There you go.

Duchess doesn't like Travis.

Okay, that's fine.

I don't.

I don't.

You know, I don't think about it.

I don't care about him that much.

Okay.

Pay attention to him.

So noted.

All right, why don't we do this?

Changing the subject now.

All right.

Now that this week is done, we're done.

Football for a while.

Ah, man, it's going to be until July.

What do you think of the usfl?

Are you going to even.

Like, in March it starts.

I might tune in just because.

Football.

Yeah.

I have to see who's playing.

Right?

So, like, the reject teams, Right.

It's all the rejects, and pretty much.

It'S like watching retarded Canadian football, kind of.

I won't watch Canadian football.

But three downs.

What the.

Whatever.

I mean, I'll.

I will check it out.

But in the meantime, like, I have no sports left, so it's.

I'll put on hockey just so I can watch people beat each other up, and I'm just gonna hang in there.

No baseball.

But the.

Baseball's kind of.

Yeah.

Yes.

Baseball's too slow.

I.

I don't like hockey.

Basketball.

I just can't watch.

Yeah, I can't watch basketball.

Although I was.

I was a fan of the Indiana Fever with Caitlin Clark.

I was a fan of her.

I was.

I loved watching those games when I got a chance to watch them.

She had a commercial on last night.

Did you enjoy that?

Did she?

It was.

She was in a Nike commercial.

I don't remember that.

It's hard to watch every commercial, you know, Bathroom.

I actually got up during the game to go to the bathroom because I didn't want to miss the commercial.

Yeah, I wasn't doing that.

I'm like, oh, they scored Another touchdown.

I.

I can go to the bathroom now.