The latest episode of the Boomer Bunker delves into ongoing discussions about immigration policy and societal expectations, highlighting how America's education system has affected the workforce and cultural dynamics. John Jamingo and the Duchess share their candid views on the contrasting work ethics of immigrants and American citizens, emphasizing the need for a shift in focus toward education and accountability.
They engage in humorous banter, touching on everything from the quirks of training hunting dogs to the absurdities of modern life while also addressing serious topics like the implications of drone usage and government oversight. The conversation takes a sharp turn as they critique the current state of politics and public perceptions, particularly surrounding figures such as Michael Vick and the complexities of social justice. With a mix of humor and hard-hitting commentary, this episode offers a lively exploration of pressing issues that resonate with listeners today.
Takeaways:
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Voice Mail Number: (856) 477-1935
00:00 - None
00:12 - Starting a Podcast Without Focus
09:38 - The Lemon Tree Revelation
19:12 - Discussion on Parenting and Society
29:14 - The Duality of Expectations in Relationships
39:51 - The Perils of Bear Hunting
53:13 - Stand Your Ground: A Discussion on Self-Defense Laws
01:02:41 - The Encroaching Fog: Drones and Government Oversight
01:14:47 - The Controversy of Michael Vick
01:17:37 - The Broken Immigration System
01:34:48 - The Journey of 2024 Miles
01:49:45 - Preparing for a New Year
All right, you guys, podcast time.
We got the equipment and the perfect business plan.
Give our show away for free and tell no one how to find it.
Ready?
I'm gonna start a podcast that has no focus, and it'll take up an inordinate amount of time.
Welcome back, ladies and gentlemen, to another riveting episode of the Boomer Bunker, the podcast that tackles the tough topics, share some laughs, and dive headfirst into the sea of controversy.
With no life jackets in sight, I'm thrilled to introduce your hosts, the dynamic duo who bring wisdom, wit, and a whole lot of candor.
First up, she's the voice of reason with a dash of sass, always ready to call it like she sees it.
The Duchess.
And joining her, he's the no nonsense sidekick armed with bold opinions and a bald head that's ready to shine.
John Jamingo.
Together, they'll navigate the latest headlines, dive into deep debates, and maybe even share a pee bucket anecdote or two.
So buckle up and get ready for a conversation that's as lively as it is enlightening.
Without further ado, here are Duchess and Jamingo.
Hello, everybody.
Still waiting for Duchess to get here.
I guess she's stuck in traffic, but that's okay because the show starts at 6:30, and it starts whether she's here or not, so.
Hey, I just made it.
Hey.
Oh, my goodness.
All right, so I know you said we're not supposed to talk about this, but how do we have.
After we've just promoted how you were going to be here in the right Boomer?
How do we do that without telling people?
Oh, I think we should talk about it.
I thought you said you didn't want to talk about it in the beginning.
No, I said we should because I promoted.
Oh, okay.
For the folks watching, I am not at the Jamingo studios.
No.
And I am pissed because I cleaned the bathroom, I ran the vacuum, I dusted, and I had some technical problems, and I'm setting up, and all of a sudden, like, Streamyard was crashing, and I'm like, what was.
That's odd.
That's odd.
So, I don't know.
I know it's the computer that I'm using.
I'm just using a Mac air.
It's not like it's the Mac Mini that I use here.
So I even emptied the pee bucket, disinfected that.
I did all this.
I hid the pee bucket.
Forget about disinfecting.
I hid it, did all the stuff, and I said to Duchess, I.
I'm not comfortable Trying to do this.
That's fine.
This way.
I really kind of set it up, to be honest with you.
I really just set it up for when Deuce comes here.
And we won't live stream.
We'll just record.
So.
Johnson.
Yeah, you're right.
I just cleaned the house for no reason.
Absolutely right.
100% right.
Not that the house is dirty, but it's not woman clean.
You know, it's dude clean.
No, it's dude, dude clean.
I had.
I.
I even had.
I don't use a pee bucket.
I had a bucket all ready for Duchess if she needed it.
You know, like I am that kind of host.
While I was right up the road, I would take the drive.
Aaron says it probably did you some good to clean the house.
Well, you say that, but now I can barely walk.
Like my right knee is killing me.
And I'm not 100% sure why that is, because usually it's my left knee that's bothering me.
And it's really weird because there's this thing out now, and I've.
I swear.
Listen.
I swear our phones listen to us.
So then when you go on any app, things pop up.
Now, I didn't bring this up at first because.
But today I'm going through TikTok looking for stuff for the show, and this thing came up.
What's called the Schumann residents.
Have you ever heard of the Schumann residence?
No.
All right, so is it a family?
It's a frequency that.
Oh, okay.
And there's some kind of frequency.
I.
I still don't.
Listen, I dug into this residence resident, like a.
Like a frequency.
Like a frequency resonance.
Okay?
Resonance.
What?
Did I say residence?
I thought you said a residence.
That's why I thought it was probably a family.
Okay.
I'm that guy now.
I'm like.
You're.
I'm like the uncle that's over.
And he's like, you know, he just says the wrong words, and everybody just goes, let him go.
Just let him go.
He's.
We know what he meant.
So I saw a video on it, and 100.
They do that.
You should see the ads.
My phone shows me.
I'm not going to divulge what.
But trust me, the phone is listening.
Yeah.
And the FBI.
Yeah, I'm not lying.
Don't say anything out loud, Aaron.
So today I saw this video, and I'm like, what's this?
I mean, I've never heard of this before.
I'll click on that.
So I want to dig into it, and I'll be honest with you.
I still don't understand it.
Well, let's hear.
Let's.
Here it is.
Hey, friends.
It's me, Aaron, your friendly neighborhood energy alchemist with today's Schumann resonance report for Monday, December 30th.
Not a lot has changed.
All right?
Seriously, this is a significant amount of energy.
This is just as much, if not more intense of the energy we got on November 30th.
This big wall of white energy coming in.
This is very high intensity, very high vibration, and it's really, really hitting home for me.
So I wanted to tell you my experience, my symptoms.
Just so you know, you're not alone.
Okay, so the first thing I will say is, this morning, I woke up very early with a panic attack.
It was.
My heart was racing.
I couldn't catch my breath.
I couldn't really point out what it was.
I don't know if I had a dream that triggered it or what, but the amount of resonance between the incoming energy and my base frequency is really kicking up a notch today.
I can feel it building all around me as if waiting to integrate.
And that is giving me a sense of anxiety, of restlessness, nervousness, all that sort of stuff that comes from the resonance between the gap in this energy and your base frequency.
The other thing, I'm experiencing quite a bit of our spiritual hot flashes.
I did have someone reach out to me and ask what was the mechanism of that?
And it's actually a lot more simple than you think.
And if you've ever had a.
A hormonal hot flash, this is different.
And you know the difference.
A spiritual hot flash is a rush of heat into your body.
For me, my whole body is hot all at once like that.
Out of nowhere, I break out into a sweat, and then within a minute, I'm freezing again.
These are my.
I call them the freezy hots, spiritual hot flashes.
Now, the reason you may experience these is because, remember, the movement of energy produces heat, just like when you boil water.
So when you are receiving big pushes of high intensity energy into your body, you can often experience those spiritual hot flashes as it rushes into your body.
My sleep is not happening.
My body is a little bit sore in my lower joints.
And all of this is attributed to this energy coming in because it's asking us to move forward, to let go of where we planted our feet and take steps towards something better for ourselves.
Okay.
Oh, my God.
All right, so everybody's like, oh, okay.
Well, what do we have chat lit up here?
The chat has some energy, a little resonance there, right?
Her voice is Giving me anxiety and hot flashes.
I'm a witch.
And I already think she sounds.
I think she sounds like a nut job.
Get to the fucking point.
I get it.
Okay, all right, all right.
But so what I understand our frequency is supposed to be around 7 hertz.
I don't know.
But here's.
And I've heard this before.
You're supposed to ground yourself.
Like, in other words, we are one with Earth, okay?
And back in the oldie days, we used to walk around without shoes on.
And when you touch the Earth, you grounded yourself.
If you don't ground yourself, you can have all this buildup of static and energy that you're getting from the atmosphere, and we.
Okay, now, I never.
I always have shoes and socks, and I don't ever go out and touch the ground with my bare feet.
So some people have these things called grounding mats that you plug into an outlet, into the grounding port of the outlet, and then you lay on this thing.
It's supposed to be the same thing as going out with putting your feet on the ground.
So I was like, well, is that what I need?
Because I'm not.
I'm not lying.
When I woke up this morning today, I felt like I was beat with a baseball bat.
I'm the only guy I know that I get, like, injured sleeping.
Like, I wake up, and I think.
A lot of people wake up like that.
My knee hurts, my shoulder hurts.
You know, my arm must have slept on my side, my hands asleep, you know, that kind of shit.
So I'm thinking to myself, do I need a grounding mat, or do I want to go out and stick my feet on the ground for a while and see if that works or.
Because I'm telling you, I was limping around today and cursing.
I was like, I'm telling you, if I would have had.
I feel like, take that cane I got for Christmas and just cut my leg off above the knee.
It was.
I think that would have been less painful.
I really do.
It's called old age.
I'm not that old.
I'm only 63.
I know, it's crazy.
Aaron says it happens to me, too.
We really are brothers.
Serious.
It's crazy.
And Josh says, f me, I've walked over 2,000 miles this year, and even I don't believe in grounding.
All right.
All right.
Well, that's all right.
I mean, thinks that pumping your own gas will help.
Now you, Bob.
Pumping your own.
Don't be jelly, Bob.
Yeah, I mean, you can all you like, like.
Oh, I don't have to pay taxes on.
Yeah, well, you still have to get out of your car and do it.
Gotta get out of your car.
We don't.
Yeah, we don't.
Look, we don't have much here in Jersey.
I'm keeping the gas.
It's not a big.
I don't know why they get all bent out of shape over that.
I, I really don't.
Jelly.
You know, it's like we, you know what we can't do here?
We can't go to a 711 or a Wawa and get beer like you guys do.
That's okay.
We can't get.
We can't.
That's one thing we, we don't do here.
I'm sure you have that down there.
Most rednecks do.
We have.
Oh, really?
Yeah.
I, I don't know.
I, I.
Hey, Bob gets all, he gets all bound up about that.
It really goes up his ass like a fucking open umbrella that we don't have to pump, pump, pump.
Are going gas.
Oh, we get rest.
All right.
Can I say something about dumb white women?
Can I, can I say something about.
And, and I want.
When I say dumb white women, I'm not talking about you, okay?
And you don't need to come to the defense of dumb white.
No, some of them are just dumb, right?
Because when you do, you're like.
It almost makes you look like you're part of it and you're not.
Okay?
So I just want to preface the fact that a lot of white women are fucking, like, stump dumb.
They are morons.
Case in point is this video right here.
Thanks.
I can't be the only person on the planet that didn't know that you can just pick a piece of fruit off of a tree and eat it.
I had a friend come over a few weeks ago, and she was like, carly, why do you have a bag of lemons in your fridge?
And I said, oh, well, I use lemons in my cooking a lot.
And sometimes I put them in my sparkling water.
And she was just like, no, but why do you have a bag of lemons from the store?
And I said, oh, well, sometimes I cook with them.
And I also put them.
And she said, no, you have a lemon tree outside.
And I said, okay.
And she said, so why do you buy lemons?
And I said, because I cook with them.
And she said, the light bulb still hasn't went off.
God.
Okay, now, is this a troll?
Is she this stupid?
I mean, in other words, did she actually think.
I don't know, is there more to that video.
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Because I want to find you.
I want you to see when the light bulb actually goes on.
It's Carly.
You have a lemon tree.
You just pick the lemons off the.
Tree and you put them in your food or in your sparkling water.
And I said, don't you have to.
Do something to them?
And she said, what do you mean?
And I said, you don't have to do anything to the lemons.
And she was pretty upset, which I guess I am one of the very few people.
I didn't think that I was one.
Of the very few people, but maybe.
I am one of the very few.
People that didn't know that there is.
Nothing that you have to do to a lemon before you eat it from a tree.
You can just take it off the tree.
Am I the only per.
I'm 28.
For reference.
Am I the only person?
Yeah, I would say yeah, you are.
You are.
You are.
Your parents have failed you.
Your parents have totally failed you.
Did they not read you one book where you could see produce on a tree?
I.
I got to say.
Show your pictures.
Have you.
The Internet is at your fingertips, right?
Where do you think lemons come from?
I was.
Why do you think they have to go to the store and then come back to you?
I can't.
I know.
I, I, I, I.
And again, I.
So, like, sometimes I'll work with someone, a woman, and they'll say something to me, like, how do.
How do you want me to.
How do you.
We're going to do a video, and I want to send you video clips.
Do I have.
How do I.
How do I send them to you?
So I tell them, you know how to send them to me?
And they're like, okay, do you need them a certain way?
Well, just the one format that you normally use.
Just send them that way.
Well, I mean, so then it's a long, giant conversation about how I'm supposed to get five video clips, and I want to bang my head against the wall.
I mean, it's crazy.
And I'm thinking to myself, why are we doing this?
And, you know, and then again, like, women, when, no offense, women, but that's.
Not a good start.
Right to your sense.
I'm going to tell you that right now.
No offense, but you just think that things happen.
It's like, you know, okay, I want to put an outlet on this wall.
I'm like, all right, well, now I gotta.
I gotta cut the wall at the bottom, and I gotta cut a spot at the top and I gotta fish a wire and I gotta drill up through, and then I gotta go across the ceiling and, you know, over to the box and all in there, and it's like.
No, you just put the box there and an outlet.
No, it's like, come on.
Are you kidding me?
Come on.
Come on.
Nobody is that dumb.
Nobody is that dumb.
Oh, you'd be surprised.
No, they can't be.
You would be.
I don't.
I don't do home repairs.
I am not electrician.
But I know you just can't cut open the wall and then stick an outlet in there and go.
Isn't there like a wire you can find in there?
Yeah.
Sparky says Bluetooth electric.
Bluetooth trademark that.
Trademark that.
Make it happen, Sparky, please.
Hey, I want to.
How far is Patterson from you?
So, Patterson.
Probably a Good solid hour 15.
It's.
It's north and north and hooks a little bit over.
I found this place.
I want to go eat.
I was wondering maybe we could go together and grab something.
I.
I want to show you this.
This is amazing.
Would you eat a guinea pig?
This is popular on Peruvian cuisine.
I have been wanting to eat Peruvian place for a very long time.
It's a little bit hard to find.
I found it at Griselda restaurant and lounge in Patterson.
Now, my friend was squeamish, so we got some other dishes like this pasta and lomo saltado.
But I was here for one thing, and that is guinea pig.
So I had heard that this tasted like pork.
They deep fried it.
They usually sell it in a.
As I took my first taste, I actually thought that this tasted more like rabbit.
I had to pair this meat with some Inca Cola.
If you know, you know.
Now, the skin, it was deep fried.
It was nice and crispy.
So like any other deep fried fried skin, there were so many bones and not a lot of meat.
And I was kind of freaked out by seeing the teeth on that head.
I ate this whole thing on Tick Tock Live.
My friend Madge said that I was only going to take a bite and stop.
No, I ate the whole thing.
But as I said, there were so many bones and no milk.
Curious how much it cost.
$50.
Oh, my God.
$50 for a Guinea.
$50 for a Guinea pig?
Well, probably just the work.
Just.
Just a.
Oh, damn, that's rude.
Looking at my two little dummy.
Gimme guinea pigs over here.
Well, now I know where you could take them to get rid of them.
I'm not going to Patterson.
Mom says some touches is sitting on a hundred Dollars.
Hey, see, at least I spent way.
More than $100 on these stupid things.
Just feeding them.
I do know.
So Sparky says, do you know what TV show this music is from?
Is that the Dating Game?
Is it the Dating Game?
I thought it was a Dating Game.
How about this is on I.
There's a particular reel that.
It's the one with all the captions.
It's called I think I'm Michael or whatever.
And it's one of those.
They take a video and.
Or they show a video of some awful person doing something stupid.
And then what it does, it takes.
And then it goes straight to the comments and highlights the really terrible ones, like the one that we'd played with the woman's like, here's the trend.
If you had to guess my name, what would it be?
And it was like cat piss.
Never, never clean.
And all these terrible names because she.
You know, and it was just it.
So that.
That's.
I'm always playing that song.
So there's this one I saw today.
It's a huge guy.
I mean, he is big and he's dressed in western gear and he's got a side shooter and a pistol in here and he's got a gun.
So he's sitting there and he's like, ting, ting, ting.
He's shooting these targets and he's pulling out this other gun.
He's shooting.
He's walking and he goes, what's his name?
And they're calling him Belly the Kid.
And the names were amazing.
We'll have to link a couple of them in the Discord because they are so funny.
It doesn't work here on the show.
No, it's.
It's definitely a video you have to watch.
So maybe you can link a couple of them in show notes or something.
Well, you know, you have to join our Discord and you'll have to find them.
I'm sorry, we're not going to link them in the show notes.
You have to find us.
All right, the comments are.
Now everyone knows you have to bake a guinea pig.
Bob says air fry and Red says guinea pigs in a blanket.
Guinea pig.
You're supposed to be on my side for this.
I like that.
Yeah, there you go.
I love that.
I do.
I do have a puff pastry dough.
I guess you could roll them right up in it.
Oh, these little things, they're guinea pig pot pie.
That would be good too.
Anything with Ravi.
Look, I'm sorry.
These little suckers were not meant to live three plus years longer than I Took them in.
I mean, we just celebrated my third year of having these things.
I don't know, I would, I would be getting rid of them somehow.
I.
I would be out there waving them at a hawk and tossing them in the air.
Oh, they wouldn't even know.
That's the.
They're blind.
They're blind.
They're like.
Put them outside to be like, hey, what's this?
And then they, they're gone.
I don't need nature snatching these things up.
Do you know who Andrew Tate is?
Yeah, I know of him.
Yeah.
Okay.
He's a real charmer.
I understand.
But he said something today and it kind of made me.
Made me go, he's a little creepy.
He's a little creepy.
Okay, so this is what he said.
White people are doomed to fail because they're the only race that cares what women think and say.
And I was like, okay.
He says the results.
Liberalism.
LGBT birth rates decline.
Wife says, no more babies.
One is enough.
White man agrees.
The black man simply fucks someone else.
A white man will never, ever, ever win.
Because you're the only race women can control.
Women can't control brown or black men.
It's why they chase us.
To be honest, they like it.
Every white woman alive fantasizes about a black man.
Is he black?
I don't know what he is.
He's something.
I mean, I heard he's a big douchebag.
He's not.
He's not.
Does he live in America?
Doesn't he have to live in Europe?
He lives in Romania, I think.
Yeah, he can't because he's due to get arrested in like a bunch of countries.
Right?
Okay.
Yeah.
So it says.
I'll take what he says with a grain of salt.
White man's civilization is collapsing because they're neutered by the brutal, crudely ineffective females and pandering to their emotion, emotionality.
I was like, well, he's picking winners.
Well, when you say this, when you say this, white people get mad.
I'm a real man.
My wife is the best.
I'm a real dad.
But that's a hard cope.
Women control you.
That's why you let foreigners in.
And those foreigners don't listen to women, so they outbreed you.
Now, let's review.
Okay, let's go with your moose lambs.
They breed like cockroaches, right?
They.
How many of they don't live over there?
So I'm talking about the ones that live here.
I don't know.
I don't associate with your Muslims, right?
I don't know any.
I mean, a few, but like.
And then how many black women have multiple baby daddies?
I'm not saying the white broads ain't catching up.
There's.
They're starting to get.
The white broads ain't catching.
Okay, all right, well, but then again, maybe they, maybe the white broads have, you know, maybe their baby daddies aren't white.
Okay.
Which is, you know, I'm not saying that that's.
Well, why, why would women have so many babies?
Is it because the.
Well, see what happens when the white.
Man told them to?
When a man takes his wee wee and sticks it in her glory.
No, that's not what I said.
I understand how I said why, dummy.
I don't know.
I think because.
Well, I think sport is, you know, has become more and more acceptable.
Okay.
I mean, it's not like you, you know, before you would hook up with one guy and that was kind of it.
Now it's, you know, they need to do that.
Right?
There's, you know, when guys and girls, they, you know, they're just looking for friends with benefits or, you know, something once a week or whatever.
You know, it's 1:30 in the morning and there's like, you know, they text you up.
As long as the government pays more money per month to have more babies, they going to keep doing it.
Okay, all right.
The winning races.
Simply ignore that women think and completely use them for children only.
Oh my God.
Dean.
Solution.
Dean.
Have more anals, less babies.
Of course.
Anal date, anal.
D.
Oh, no eating.
Big time.
Ebt.
Oh.
The endless kids.
And I will keep you alive.
Do not talk to me very much.
I am busy with the guys and the winning formula for the races which reproduce.
Don't shoot the messenger.
I thought that was interesting.
Is that what he said?
So, yeah, well, I, I don't think he's really.
All right.
We're having problems.
I think he's someone who should be speaking on any of that.
But we're having problems in this country with, you know, the population that keeps getting smaller and smaller.
And that's why they want.
Yeah, because the people who are at the age of having babies don't want them because they can't afford them.
Okay?
My kids don't.
They don't want kids they can't afford.
They can't get a house in the renting and stuff.
But like they want to proceed to the next step and they're not having babies.
They're not.
That's not their thing.
I don't know.
There's a lot of single women that have kids, you know, for.
For whatever reason.
But I just thought it was interesting that there was the white.
The white versus black and brown men.
How white?
We kind of pander to our women in a way.
Well, then grow a pair and stop pandering.
Yeah, I'm thinking that maybe we should stop.
What is that my problem?
I didn't say grow a massive pair of balls and just tell them shut the up.
I agree.
What do you want me to say?
It's not my fault.
I know.
I just finally, you know, start putting you women in your places.
That's, you know, basically.
Apparently not.
Apparently you like being put in your place, so.
Yeah, you know, so there.
Take it.
Well, the whole feminism, the whole feminism movement made us, you know, we, as.
As white men, we need to sit here and listen and, you know.
You do, right?
I don't just think that, to be honest with you.
I really don't think the respect is there on both ends.
Men I agree with.
Women don't respect men.
I love the videos where there's a guy out there and they say.
Did you say something?
There's a guy who's got a microphone and he's.
He's interviewing these two women.
And you know, one of them looks like a.
A busket, a busted can of biscuits, like she's pouring out of her pocket.
Yeah, me.
I got you.
Yeah, well, no, I mean, she.
We all can't look great.
Listen, she dressed like a.
She's dressed like a stripper.
But, you know, she just doesn't really.
I mean, like I said, she's not the.
She's not the Friday night mainstage stripper.
I got you.
So she says.
So the guy asks her, what do you need a man?
What do you need from a man?
What does he have to have for you to date him?
And she says, well, he has to make over $100,000.
He has to be at least six foot tall.
And he pulls out a scale and puts it on the ground and says, step on the scale.
And they're like, what do you mean, step on the scale?
And he says, well, I like a woman that's under like £200, and I just want to.
And puts the scale down on the ground.
And she's like, I'm not stepping on that scale.
A woman's weight doesn't mean make a difference.
And so it's funny to watch those videos because it happens a lot, you.
Know, I think it's fair to have expectations.
I don't think there's anything wrong with having an expectation.
But don't fuss when the person you have expectations from requires the same from you.
So, you know, you got.
What are you bringing to this end of the relationship?
Okay.
All right.
Well, if you want.
Was it.
That was the 666 combination, right?
Six foot, six figures, six foot tall, six inch wiener.
Okay, so.
Yeah.
And make six figures.
Well, you.
What are you bringing?
I mean, that's generic.
That's what they want.
Yeah.
No, but what is that chick gonna bring then to that real.
If that's what she expects.
And what do guys want?
We want a woman that.
Well, you know.
No, no.
You want one with big tits and ass.
Sucks wiener and does whatever you say.
Right.
Let's break that down.
Hold on.
So like big tits.
Yes.
Right.
Okay.
Big ass.
I don't know.
Sucks dick.
Okay, we'll do that.
And like sex twice a week.
Is that too much to ask?
Enjoy sex.
Okay.
Okay.
Enjoys it.
All right.
You know, what do we guys do?
We care if they enjoy it.
Make a good sandwich.
Make a good sandwich.
That's right.
You know, make dinner.
Keep the house clean.
You know, sometimes I'm gonna be.
I'm of the belief that all you bring to the relationship is somebody else.
You're lacking.
You're right.
See, we wouldn't.
We want more than that.
We want somebody that's gonna take care of the.
The says don't forget anal.
Anal for that.
Oh, here you go, Bob.
Bob knows when to shut the fuck up.
Yeah, women, you need to know when to shut the up.
That's all.
Little respect, Res.
I think it needs to be mutual.
I agree.
Okay.
Okay.
I think.
I think respect should be on both sides.
Right?
But I mean, like, in other words, you got to give to get.
Bob says I'll clean your house.
I'll clean my own house, cook my own food and do my own laundry.
Just don't be a.
Okay.
There you go.
All right.
Bruce has something to weigh in.
Says quick hit in the room to wish you both happy New Year.
And yes, big tits.
PJs and steaks.
Steaks.
Got to be able to make a good steak.
Yeah, A good meal.
That's all.
Make some desserts.
All right, Sparky, I think you're getting a little out of hand, but I.
Agree with the threesome every now and then.
I don't know.
I don't need.
I don't need to be disappointing two women at the same time.
Say it.
I.
It's Just to me, I.
I think that the kids today, they've.
Today, right.
The kids today, they've grown up where they're more in.
In a house, you know, they're more introverts, it seems like.
Oh, it absolutely is.
Right?
And then they go.
When they go out that they're like feral cats, you know, they just back that ass up.
Threesomes are overrated.
Aaron says.
Aaron says threesomes are overrated.
I think that that deserves a little more conversation.
I've never been involved in a threesome.
Okay, here's.
Here's the way it is.
It's a threesome.
If it's an Eiffel Tower, two men, one girl, that's a gay act.
Oh, okay.
If it's two girls, two chicks at the same time, it's not a gay act.
But, I mean, you.
You have to be.
I don't know.
Just be prepared to handle that.
Yeah, I mean, that's a lot of work.
Unless you're sitting back with a camera or something, I guess.
How's that song go you're doing?
I'm a lazy lover.
No, I'm only kidding.
Easy, lover.
Same thing.
Not really.
All right, all right, last one.
On this one, Aaron says a lot.
Of work for the same, right?
Who gets the nut?
If you're with two girls at the same time, who gets it?
Or you just do.
You just shoot it around like there are two cinnamon rolls.
I don't know.
I don't know how that works.
Oh, no.
Moving on.
Just drizzled all over the place.
Oh, my God.
Well, you say that, but there is this one woman who has two vaginas.
Yes, I saw that story and thought we would have to discuss that.
All right, here she is.
I don't see it flapping out there.
Well, no kidding.
All right, so this is her thing.
I was born with two vaginas.
You won't believe disgusting things that I've heard while dating.
Now, she's very attractive.
Red hair.
Yeah.
She's got a Jason.
Love her.
I'm just telling you.
Well, big daddy over here likes her too.
All right, well, you like them redheads.
I.
You know what?
I don't have a hair preference, but I'm an equal.
Opportune.
Brown hair, blonde hair, redhead.
That's fine.
No hair, short hair, long hair, doesn't matter.
Woman born with two vaginas have revealed the disgusting behavior she faces on the.
On the dating apps.
She's 26 years old.
You know what?
She looks older.
Really?
She's 26?
Yeah.
I know.
That's she.
She looks like 36.
I know.
Yeah, I think we're padding those numbers.
She has uterus delidious.
I don't know how to say that word.
That's funny.
D, I, D, E, L, P, H, Y, S.
She found out when she was 16.
The uterus develops two ducts, which.
All right, so in other words, so she's got two sets of plumbing, so she could get pregnant in both.
In both now.
So I think they're one.
It's one over the other, I believe.
Unless they're side by side.
Let me see.
I'm looking, actually, I don't recall that.
Combines the ducts do not combine.
Two uteruses in development, in some cases, two cervixes, two vagina canals can also be created.
Okay, now I'm thinking of this as a guy, right?
I'm thinking as a guy.
But I mentioned this story to somebody else today and she said, that's fucking horrible.
Yeah, it is.
And I said, periods.
Two periods.
Two.
You know, men, you know, menopause.
Imagine going through menopause with two vaginas.
Just non stop, right?
Just be constant PMSing twice.
You know, double your pleasure, double your fun.
But what she.
So she.
It's one entryway, but two canals, I guess is what we're looking at.
I don't know, I.
I was hoping for some pictures or at least a diagram.
A diagram actually would be helpful.
Yes.
Not.
Not, you know, hey, listen, if she has two clits, be easy.
Sorry.
Yeah, maybe a guy could find one.
Doubt it.
So she said she had a specific encounter with a high profile man that she had been dating.
She said things have been going well.
After a few drinks, he comes over with his friend.
I'm like, okay.
Next minute he says, I've been thinking that he and his mate want to be tunnel bunnies.
All right?
Tunnel buddies.
Tunnel buddies.
Tunnel buddies in her separate love tunnels.
So how is.
And again, I'm thinking to myself, how.
Close do you want to be?
That's what I'm saying to your friend.
Like, I'm thinking to myself, I don't think these guys.
It's not like they're side by side.
Like, her legs don't come off.
And it's not like, how far apart are you?
It's not like it's a double garage.
You know what I mean?
It's not like it's side by side.
I would imagine there's one over top, one over top of the other.
Kind of like a.
So then how do you do that.
How do you.
So do you have to sit on your friend's lap in order to make this happen?
Look, I don't want to.
I know there's some porn out there that's double penetration.
Oh, my God.
All right.
Where it's two guys and I'm like, look again.
I go back to the gay act where, you know, there's, I mean, when you're just.
When you're weenies and against another man's weenie, even if it's going in the vagina.
I'm sorry, that's a gay act.
Where's your balls at this?
Like, where's the boys at at this point now?
Are they just swinging in the breeze or how does that work?
Yeah, where do you.
I have questions I don't know if I want the answers to, but I do.
I'm trying to envision it, and I don't like what I'm envisioning, so I'm gonna try to not think about this.
I was wondering and I couldn't find out.
I was wondering if she had an only fans because that one.
Oh, well, I'm surprised you haven't found.
Them for research purposes.
I wanted to find out maybe that, you know, I could see what was going on down there.
Oh, here you go.
For science.
You said redhead and Jason appeared.
That's a redhead.
Yeah, it is a red.
Well, I don't know if it's a true redhead, but okay, but.
And then Bob with the scientific question.
Can she queef out of both?
Oh, I imagine that would be sound like.
It sound like a pair of bagpipes.
Sword fighting.
Yeah, it says sword.
Sword fighting.
Yeah.
I just don't understand.
Like I said too.
And I'm not drawing a picture, right?
Absolutely not.
Yeah.
I'm just.
Oh, my goodness.
I, I thought that that was kind of a.
I, I, you know what in to take all the.
The silliness out of it.
I actually feel bad for her because that's got to be.
Yeah.
For her.
Like you.
How do you date normally?
Although I guess is so the youngins is that all you guys do is just go on dating apps.
Like, do you meet people in person ever?
But then again, like, how do you preface that conversation?
Like, obviously you'd have to meet somebody, talk to them for a while.
Well, you know what the kids do today?
They slide into your Instagram dms.
Like they see an attractive girl and they slide into the DMs and say, you know, it's like when you go, you're at a Bar.
And you approach a woman, right?
And then, you know, they just start chatting or whatever, and the next thing you know, they make a date to go somewhere they don't even.
But how do you.
How do you find somebody on Instagram?
Like, do you just creep around on Instagram till you find someone you think works?
What if.
I mean, just.
I guess.
I guess the.
For you.
I don't know, to be honest with you.
I mean, I meet people all the time.
I would imagine, like, again, remember, I'm an old guy and I really don't know how to work the social medias that well, but I imagine that the.
The girls would have some kind of hashtag that they would use.
You know, on Twitter, you don't use.
They're available.
You don't use hashtags anymore.
Even Elon Musk says, don't even use them.
See, I missed that.
I missed that.
On Instagram, I think you can still use them, but.
Right.
It helps.
Helps track everything.
But I.
The double vag isn't like a deviated septum?
I don't think so.
No.
I mean, that's.
I just feel bad.
That's.
I would imagine that's a rough way.
To go through life because you'd have to explain that.
And I'm sure every guy that you end up with is going to be like, so.
Well, I would imagine, like questions.
Yeah, well, once.
Let's go crazy.
And again, I don't know how this.
I don't know that there was no diagram, but I mean, if there's two openings you could use, be the weekday and the weekend.
Well, you can.
You can implement other things like toys and such.
Right?
I mean, there you go.
You could use a toy.
Yeah.
Toys, I mean, right?
Yeah, you could be.
You could be in one and then the other one.
That would work.
Just saying.
Okay, well.
Make you blush.
I'm sorry.
No, no, I'm fine.
You okay over there?
No, I'm good.
All right.
Oh, my God.
I just feel bad.
That's just not.
That's a rough way to just go through life because you'd have to until you found the guy.
Could you imagine whoever.
The gynecologist.
The first time.
Hey, guess what?
Guess what I have.
That's what you have.
Or.
Or she has no idea.
Right.
And then the gynecologist comes in and goes, you gotta sit down.
We gotta talk.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's.
That's.
That sucks.
You know.
Hey, you gotta see this.
It brings her.
Brings them in.
Brings everybody in.
Yeah.
Amazing.
Yeah.
Can I Take pictures.
Yeah, it's.
That's rough.
It's.
It's no good.
I.
I don't want to say it's no good.
It would be very challenging to live your life that way, especially if there's two of everything.
You know, Sparky says, I think there is a left road and a right road once you get inside.
Oh, maybe.
So I guess you got to figure out which highway you want to take, right?
Just don't.
Just don't crash into the medium.
That's the problem.
That would hoit if you crash into the medium.
Yeah.
Don't go.
Don't drop down, because that's a whole nother problem.
Right.
That would hurt.
It's gonna be.
She's already dealing with enough.
You don't have to do any more indignities going there.
Oh, Josh says, remember those double mink commercials?
Double your pleasure, double your fun, double your nut.
Double nut.
Oh, my God.
Double nut.
Poor woman.
Virginia.
Man dies after a bear shot in a tree falls on him.
I'm like, I heard this story yesterday.
We laughed about this for a half hour.
And I was like, I need to find this so we can bring this to the.
To the show, because there's no way that's not going to spark some discussion.
Okay.
So when you sent me this, I was like, how the does this happen?
Because, like, how stupid are you?
I've been out.
Stupid are you.
I've been out coon hunting.
And, you know, and so when you go and you get the dogs to tree a coon.
Yes.
Then you.
You shoot the coon out of the tree, and then, you know, you got to keep the dogs away from it, or the dogs will rip it apart.
But I've never seen a coon fall on a hunter before.
And, you know when you're squirrel hunting, you shoot a squirrel and, you know, that thing comes down.
I've never seen somebody get hit by.
How do you get hit by a fucking bear?
I'm guessing you're standing in the wrong fucking spot.
Yeah.
Lester C.
Harvey, 58, was rushed to two different hospitals after being struck by a fallen bear.
The hunting group was following the bear, and it went up a tree, and then the group retreated from the tree.
A hunter shot the bear, and the animal fell onto another hunter who was standing about 10ft away.
How drunk are you and stupid are you to be standing right there?
I figured, the bear's up there, and he's like, you know what?
He might kill me, but I'm taking one of these motherfuckers with me and just dove out of the tree.
And poor Lester C.
Harvey was just the unfortunate.
I got him.
I got him.
These are the long shots I hit.
I don't hit the $1.2 billion mega millions.
I don't hit that.
Long shot.
No.
I hit the long shot where the bear falls out of a tree and kills me.
Long shot like Elmer Siford.
What's the biggest.
What's.
What's the longer shot of?
What's the.
What's the word I'm looking for here?
Someone help me.
Odds.
What's the bigger odds?
Hitting the mega millions or having a bear fall out of the fucking tree and killing you?
Wabbit season.
Duck season.
Bear season.
Lester C.
Harvey does not sound like a Nobel laureate.
No, he does not.
He does not.
Now, Elmer.
See Fudd.
When Yogi attacks, you would think that.
That.
That's like a one in a million.
You would think.
You'd be wrong.
In 2018, a man in Alaska was critically injured after his hunting partner shot a bear on a ridge.
The animal tumbled down a slope into the man, who was also struck by the rocks that were dislodged by the bears that was rolling down the hill.
I'm so sorry.
Another man in 2019.
Gravity, people, gravity.
It's gonna kill.
Another man.
When he was injured in 2019 after his hunting partner shot a bear in a tree in North Carolina.
The bear fell out of the tree and began biting the other hunter.
The man and the animal tumbled off a cliff.
The hunter was taken to a hospital while the bear was found dead later.
Oh, poor bear.
You know, they're just trying to live.
And I get your hunting, and I understand that, but you have to think a little bit.
Here's the thing.
I'm against bear hunting.
And the reason.
All right, hang on.
Jason says final destination 20.
When nature back.
Yeah, exactly.
Jason.
Well, 100.
You know, it's weird.
I remember a friend of mine was going out to.
Where's Yellowstone at?
It's like Wyoming, Montana.
There's grizzly bears.
Yes.
So he was going out with that.
Yogi bear, Like, actual real ones.
So he was going for elk and he had a bow and arrow.
So he was going to shoot an elk with a bow and arrow, but he carried a.45 pistol.
And the guy's like, why are you carrying a.45 pistol?
He goes, well, in case I see a grizzly bear.
And he says, well, let me just tell you something.
If you see a grizzly bear and he's coming at you with that.45 and you got that.45 pistol, you should just stick it in your mouth and shoot yourself in the head because you're never going to stop that bear with a.45.
No.
I mean, I don't think people realize how massive grizzly bears are.
I mean they're huge.
They can take a lot of shots, I'm pretty sure, unless you're shooting them with something massive.
But there was this documentary of this guy that used to.
He loved bears and he would go to Alaska and he would hang out with the bears and he did this for years.
He would go out there and he named them and he would do all this stuff.
And then one day he was up there with his girlfriend and there was this old bear there and the old bear attacked him, killed him and his girlfriend and ate them.
Oh my God.
And here's the thing.
The camera was still rolling when this happened.
And bears like, they don't have any predators, so they don't.
It's like you ever see a berry to salmon, like they just like tear its head off and they just, they don't care.
They don't want to kill it.
They don't care if they kill it.
They just start eating it.
And you can hear this guy and his girlfriend just now.
They don't play this in the documentary.
And I think it was like, in other words, they don't.
But there's actual audio out there because he was off camera.
But you can hear the screams of him.
I don't want to hear that.
And it went on for quite, quite some time.
I bet it went on for way longer than it should have.
Oh my God.
That's.
That's.
Let's go hunting.
That's fun.
No, no, no.
That's so nice.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I don't like going anywhere where you know what, wherever when you're, what you're.
Hunting is going to eat you or.
Not only that, but something out there could.
They're apex predators.
Who's eating a bear?
Another bear maybe.
That's about it.
I don't know if you know that in New Jersey they have coyotes now.
We have coyotes in New Jersey.
Yeah.
They're on the beach and they're on Long Beach Island.
Pretty big.
I mean some of these things are.
These may not be as big, but.
Yeah, out in the woods the size.
Of good sized German shepherds that are.
Ones that are around here and.
What do you mean around here?
Like by you?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Oh, that's fun.
Yeah.
You know where the, the river is and there's a Golf course there.
They had someone take the conference, are out there golfing, and all of a sudden this wild e coyote comes wandering out on the golf course and just like, looking around, like looking for a rabbit or a squirrel or.
Tells you they're.
They're very accustomed to humans.
Yeah.
They don't give a shit.
Noise.
They don't care.
I hope they got in their cart and left.
Well, I guess.
But you know what?
They finished the hole.
What's going on now is if you have like a small dog or a cat and you let it out the.
Out of them.
Yeah.
They'll eat them.
Same thing.
We have bald eagles here too.
Yeah.
So bald eagles and big hawks.
No.
Known to take a cat or two by us.
Yeah.
Oh, yeah, we had.
We had.
My daughter had her rabbit outside.
Oops.
And she had a rabbit.
No, no, we watched it.
It was.
We.
It was hopping in the grass and.
But we noticed, like, birds starting circling.
I'm like, we gotta get this rabbit inside.
I'm not fighting off a hawk for your rabbit.
Did you ever see the video of the guy?
They found a little baby rabbit and they raised it.
It was bigger, and they let it out in the front lawn.
Let it go.
Squirrel, I thought.
But.
Yeah, well, there's two.
There's one was a rabbit.
No.
And they let it go.
And they're going.
All sudden, a hawk comes by, goes, hits the rabbit, kills it and picks it up and flies away with it.
Like all within like three seconds.
Right.
Just pow.
The second one was a guy had a baby squirrel, raised it, bottle filled it, put it up against a tree.
It starts going off a tree, and the neighbor's cat came over and got it.
Oh, no.
Hey, man, it's nature.
What do you want?
It is.
It is nature.
And you can't.
You can't hand raise wildlife.
It just doesn't happen.
I mean, you can save it, but it's.
They're not acclimated for that.
And, you know, you take care of them and you put them outside, they're like, oh, great.
And then gone.
I've watched.
I've watched hawks pick off chipmunks in my yard.
We have one tree where we.
One branch was cut.
So it almost looks like a.
It's at a junction where there's two big branches.
And then it almost looks like a plate.
Like a plate size.
There's a chipmunk sitting on it.
We were looking at it outside our kitchen window and this bird just like swooped by and snatched this chipmunk so fast.
My Daughter screamed and she's like, no, it was so fast, like it was insane.
Well, Al will do it too.
So when I was, when I had the beagles for hunting rabbits, we would, you know, during this, you know, after rabbit hunting season, you still had to exercise them.
So I had this place down in, in the pine barrens of New Jersey.
It was 56 acres, it was fenced in.
And you take the dogs there, we could run them at night and they just wouldn't, they couldn't get out, which was nice.
I mean, 56 acres, a lot of land.
And we, that's a lot of space.
And we would trap rabbits and bring them and put them in there for exercise.
The one time we're sitting there and we're watching, this rabbit comes out and runs out in the field and starts running.
We're listening to dogs come up behind it.
Oh, with that, a red tailed hawk comes down.
Whack.
Comes by, down, whacks that rabbit going by, kills it, then turns around, comes back, grabs it and picks it up and flies up into a tree with it.
And I was like, son of a big bitch.
Yeah.
And the dogs come running out and they're snowing.
All of a sudden they're like, where'd it go?
Where's.
I can smell it, there's blood.
It was right here.
But those hawks smack em so hard.
It's awful.
I mean, I get it, they gotta eat too.
But it's.
I don't like watching nature, nature itself in front of me.
It's like, I don't want to see nature.
Nature I don't want to see.
I don't like watching animals.
I don't like the things on TV where, you know, the one animal eats the other.
Remember that?
What was that show that you used to watch every Sunday night?
Kingdom.
That was.
I always hated watching Mutual Kingdom.
Who was the guy they used to send out in the field?
Yeah, no, it was.
It's not like Jack Hannah.
It was just some guy.
Yeah, it was him.
No, it wasn't Jack Hannah.
It was.
It was like Richard at like one of the Attenboroughs.
Really?
I think voiced over, actually.
Let's see here.
Who's the guy?
Mutual Almost Wild Kingdom.
Jim Fowler.
Okay, Jim Fowler.
It was Jim.
Okay.
Yeah, Jim's out there.
The old guy's sitting there narrating.
Or it's got the camera and there's Jim out there wrestling a cheetah.
Well, that's it.
Look at Jim with nature.
And then Jim's like, get it off me.
Well, that was like the.
The Australian guy.
What was his name?
The crocodile.
No, what was he, though?
Yeah, what was his name?
I know.
Steve.
Irvin Erwin.
Steve Irwin.
But he was the crocodile son.
The Crocodile hunter.
Oh, and Marlon Perkins.
Marlon Perkins.
That was the old guy.
Thank you, Dean.
And then Steve Irwin, he's always, oh, look at this crocodile.
He grabs it by the tail.
He's like, oh, yeah, look at this snake.
He's poisonous.
But if you got boy's tail and swinging around, he can't get you.
And the next thing you know, he's out there swimming with a stingray.
And that thing shot.
My kids were really sad about that.
They loved him, like, right through his heart, man.
Yeah, that was it.
That's a shame.
And now, like, his.
His kids.
Weird to see his kids.
First of all, his son looks just exactly like him.
It's spooky.
And.
And then his daughter now is a baby.
I'm like, oh, it's like watching them grow.
It's.
It's neat.
It's sad, but it's like, oh, you know.
But they just.
He was very cool.
He made, you know, the whole animal.
My girls were all into animals, so they always loved watching it.
But, yeah, they were bummed when he died.
When I was really bummed.
My kids were little, they used to have this.
They watched this one show where it.
Had this lemur, Kratz creatures, and zabumafu.
Zabumafu.
I loved zabumafu.
We were.
We.
My girls cried when Zabu died.
Like, and it was re.
Somewhat recently, like in the past five years or so.
Oh, okay.
Well, it was funny because they had a real animal.
Yeah.
And then they had a puppet.
Yes.
Like, the puppet turned into the real Ammon Aminal animal.
There you go, folks.
We're done.
Talking's rough.
I know, I know.
No, it was a good show.
It was a great show.
It was Kratz creatures.
And then was the character.
Yeah, he was very cute.
Yeah.
Crap brothers weren't hard to watch either.
So it was a good show for everybody.
I'm like, let's watch this show.
That's how I felt about Mom's super into animals.
That's how I felt about Kim Possible, and she was only a cartoon.
I know.
Shame on you.
Hey, kids, is Kim Possible one?
Whatever.
He was a lemur.
Yes, he was a ringtail lemur.
Ringtail lemur.
That's it.
He was ringtail lemur.
Well, you know what's funny is when that show was very popular because it was produced through pbs, they had you could go on to the PBS store and buy little stuffed zabuma foos.
So for Easter, the Easter bunny brought them each little zabuma foos that were in their Easter basket and they were very happy.
I think they might still have them.
I wonder.
Check into that later.
Alrighty.
Changing the subject now.
Nice.
I gotta tell you.
Yes.
I, I want the laws in Florida to be nationwide because to be honest with you, I think it would stop a lot of this crime and a lot of this bullshit.
Because in Florida they have the, you do not have to retreat.
You can stand your ground.
They have the stand your ground laws.
In your own home, no less.
Yeah.
And if someone's breaking in your home, you could pop a cap in their ass.
You know, you see them coming through the window.
This is what happened in Florida and I love this evening and welcome tonight.
I'm Mark Wilson and for Linda Hurtado.
And I'm Haley Hines.
Thanks for joining us.
First at 5, they were masked and armed with a crowbar.
But two men who broke into a Bradenton home last night ended up coming face to face with a homeowner who was armed with a gun.
Investigators say the homeowner fired shots, killing one of the intruders.
The other ran off but was arrested blocks away.
As Fox 13's Kimberly Quezon tells us, the sheriff is now praising that homeowner.
Manatee Sheriff Rookwell says the homeowner did exactly what was needed to be done to protect his family.
He says the suspect who was arrested came to the US on a 90 day visa from Chile that expire interesting September.
Just after 9.
Thursday night, a man and his wife were in their home on Hickory Hammock Circle in Bradenton's River Club when they got a security alert.
They hear this, this commotion going on.
They see these suspects that are masked up trying to break into the home.
They were able to pry that window open.
The homeowner only had seconds to act.
He knew that something bad was about.
To happen and he, he didn't stall.
He grabbed his firearm.
He told his wife to get into a safe spot.
Manatee Sheriff Rick Wells says the husband came face to face with the masked men.
One was already inside his home and another was climbing through a window.
Nearby neighbors heard what happened next.
I sat down next to the lanai.
The door was open and I vividly heard, you know, three gunshots.
27 year old Jorge Nestevan Flores, Toledo of Mexico, who goes by Annabelle Miller Valencia, was injured and later died.
Detectives say he had been arrested for Burglary in Illinois and had an active warrant for a parole violation.
The other suspect, 39 year old Michelle Sotomelo, ran guilty.
A manatee sheriff's K9 stopped him a few blocks away.
I praise this.
This husband for doing what he needed to do to protect his home and protect his family.
Sheriff Wells says Sotomello entered the U.
S.
From California on a now expired 90 day visa from Chile.
Somehow made it to Tampa about six, six days ago.
Investigators are now working to determine if Sotomello and Flores Toledo targeted other homes.
In court, Sotomello used a translator as he was ordered held in custody.
I just want to say that I never had any.
I don't want you to interpret any facts of the case.
While deputies are working to figure out why the pair came to manatee county, Sheriff Wells says there's one undeniable fact.
The bottom line is this is the state of Florida.
You want to break into someone's home, you should expect to be shot.
Additional charges are pending.
And detectives, I love that you know what, you expect to be shot.
And I agree with this.
I mean, it's really hard to.
To argue that logic.
It really, like, the guy was in his home, he was minding his own business.
These two guys broke in.
Look.
I mean, look, was this in the evening?
I'm gonna guess.
I'm sorry, missed the top.
Yeah.
Okay, so, yeah, I mean, you break into somebody's house.
Do you know what the moral of the story is?
Never bring a crowbar to a gunfight.
There you go.
You're gonna lose.
Yeah, they did.
Well, I mean, he shot the first one, you know.
Yeah.
See, a smart homeowner would let them both get in and then shoot them.
Got them both.
He probably didn't know the guy.
What's that?
I mean, if you shoot him dead.
Yeah, that's the way you're supposed to shoot them.
Dead.
Sparky says no one's breaking in your home to hand you a fruitcake.
No.
First of all, take that damn fruitcake back with you.
Nobody knows.
Nobody wants the fruitcake.
But no, that's.
I don't know.
What do you say to that?
What do you say?
All right.
Defend your home.
Are we ready to put our tinfoil hats on?
Where's the tinfoil for my hat?
Oh, John, like you don't have it.
All right, so in New Jersey.
All right, so first of all, on TikTok, you can't show drone videos anymore.
They're taking them down.
And you can't say drones, and you can't do videos.
So you know what they're doing on TikTok now?
They're calling drones Dijour bags.
They're calling them what?
Dior bags.
Dior bags.
Dior bags.
That's what they call them.
Dior bags.
Because we can't talk like adults anymore.
We got.
We got to make up words so.
That until there's so many words, you have to.
Right.
Edit.
So now they're saying that these Dior bags, these drones are now causing a fog.
And these fogs are making people sick.
This fog is making.
This fog is making people sick.
They're creating a fog.
They are creating.
They attached fog machines to them.
Or the drones are dispensing.
Dispensing a fog.
A mystery fog.
Here we go.
Okay.
Unless you're living under a rock, there.
Is a fog that is everywhere, apparently.
I saw a tick toculin Tick Tocker.
In the UK showing everyone.
She's like, we haven't had this much fog for this long.
And my throat is hurting me.
It's been like this for five days now.
I'm in Cali, California live.
And the odd part is I have.
To report there are fogs here.
Now, I saw a guy in Oklahoma, he's like, what's going on?
We don't get this like this in Oklahoma.
I understand there's a little thing called.
Precipitation, which people are saying that's what all this fog is.
But why is there global fog?
Does anybody know?
Can anybody explain it?
Now, there was a tsunami warning in.
Northern California, obviously, because There was a.
6.8 earthquake off the coast of Northern Cali.
So Portland and Northern California actually have tsunami warnings, which is crazy.
What do you patriots think about the fog?
Okay, I.
I don't know.
But again, these Dior battles are all over the place.
These drones, they're still all over the place.
There's everybody still.
Because of Christmas, we stopped talking fog.
I don't know, but I've seen.
I've seen videos of these drones, like, dropping shit that looks like fog.
You have?
Yeah, I've seen.
Seen the drones.
I've seen the videos of the drones.
Look like they're dropping stuff.
Looks like they're dropping.
Yeah.
Like they're just, like, spraying.
Yeah, they're out there.
I haven't seen that, but.
Okay, well, you don't have tick tock.
What do you want from me?
I know I have to go into the TikTok.
I would totally believe it if I saw it on TikTok because.
Well, I'm just saying they have videos of these things.
Well, the mainstream media is not doing their job.
They're not out there finding this stuff.
They're not out there doing these stories.
So the people.
The people's got a journalism.
Okay?
The media is pissed off now because Elon Musk said, we're the journalists now.
And the one guy gets up and.
Goes, we're your journalists now.
Yeah.
Guess what?
Yes, they are.
Because you don't do shit.
You pick on one you're not.
It's true.
They're not factual.
Right.
They're not factual.
And you're not watching both sides.
You're watching one side, while the other one you're making excuses for.
We all see it.
We all know it.
That's why your ratings are in a tank.
That's why no one's watching your dumb shows.
Exactly.
And if we do watch them, the only reason we watch them is to ridicule you because you sound stupid and you are stupid.
Now, I shouldn't say that.
There's a lot of people that believe your bullshit.
Oh, yeah.
But a lot of us don't.
And, you know, and we're on to you.
We're on to what you're doing.
We get it.
I don't know about the fog.
I haven't.
I haven't seen any fog.
I've been.
I've driven around.
I haven't.
I gotta tell you something much in.
The way of drones at night.
So an alien could land in your.
On your front.
On your street, in front of your house.
Little green men could come out and go, nanu, nanu.
And you still would say, ah.
It was just a.
When they show up, I will be happy to greet them with cookies.
Okay?
Does that make you happy?
I don't know Any of.
I like cookies.
What kind of cookies do you feed an alien?
Whatever ones they want.
I have chocolate chips here.
We got chocolate chips.
We got oatmeal raisin.
I don't do.
I think it's little aliens flying around?
No, And I.
I truly think the drones are.
They're government.
I think it's our government drones.
I think they're.
I still think there's dirt back.
Well, now it's Christmas, so everybody and their mother's got drones for Christmas.
So I think they're all up there too.
But I do think there's.
It is a government issue, and I don't know why the.
They're not doing anything about it.
Some of them are the size of a Suburban.
They're big.
Don't get one of them under the okay.
All right.
Well, I haven't seen the suburban ones.
I haven't hover over my house.
Trust me.
I've been out looking.
I've been out at night driving around looking for drones, and I haven't seen one.
It's kind of like deer hunt.
You're driving around, like, looking up.
Yeah, I am.
I am.
Jimmy.
I think you should get Jimmy to drive you now, and then you could just get your binoculars.
Listen, I've been out a couple times, and I've been driving.
I haven't told anybody this because I really want to sound stupid.
Now, I will snicker.
See?
Snickerdoodle.
Now, Snickerdoodle would be a good alien cookie just because of the name.
And I've driven around and I've heard that they're in the area, and I haven't seen any.
I haven't seen.
It's like deer hunting, you know?
Everybody's seen deer.
I don't.
Seeing.
Yeah, Fishing, hunting.
It's the same.
It's.
It's all like.
Everybody's like, did you see.
No, I have nothing.
I have to admit, I was trying.
To get rid of that guy.
I'm trying to remove this stuff so I don't hit the same thing twice.
Bob says anal probe cookies.
Anal probe cookies.
There you go.
Well, they can put them wherever.
What flavor are those?
They can put them wherever they want.
Bob.
I'm not.
I'm not one that judges you.
Do you, Boo.
That's.
It's whatever makes you happy.
Chocolate, duh.
Yeah.
I want to see a drone.
I want to see one.
I want to find one.
I want to see one.
At this point, I would like to just get one and go fly it and see what happens, because I would love to fuck up with my neighbors.
Oh, I see what you're saying.
But see, the drones that you get are, like, you know, they're small.
They're like, maybe this big, or maybe they're like two foot across or something like that.
It's not a big deal.
Yeah, I'm not going to lie.
I would like to get one and fly one around.
To hover it over a neighbor's house would be freaking out.
My problem is I live too close to the airport, and I can't fly them anywhere right around here.
No, you cannot.
You will go to jail.
Right?
It's that whole FAA thing.
Yeah, but why can't I just fly them, like, 300ft, these planes?
I don't know why you couldn't.
Yeah, it's not like I mean, buzzing.
It's not like I'm like a.
Up there, like a thousand feet trying to.
And it's not like I'm on a flight path, either.
You know, again, people, why is it that you think that I can't figure out where to fly a drone?
Why do I need the government.
The government to tell me where I can fly a drone?
Lived here all my life.
I know where the fucking planes are, and I know where not to fly them.
I know.
So silly.
Stop telling us what to do all the time.
Says Aaron, says you can mess with.
Your neighbors with a couple helium balloons and some led.
I've seen that.
I saw the video for that.
The guy puts these helium balloons with the lights on them and just lets them float up into the air and off they go.
Yeah, and then.
And then F16 shot a Hellfire missile at it.
That cost, like, $2 million and shot down a.
A helium balloon.
Yes.
Sparky says the laws are out there for the stupid people.
Yeah, but they catch the other people.
I know someone in Jenison that would love it if you fly one outside of his podcast window.
And we're talking about our good old pal Eric Zane, so.
Well, your good old pal today, not mine.
Listen, I haven't listened to Eric in a while because he.
He's not really.
He's a moron.
Well, he's boring now, like, every once in a while.
I like it when he yells at the chat, you know?
So apparently Michael Vick was on one of the football shows because he's now a coach of a college football team.
That's insane.
Now, Michael Vick, that's a hell of.
A comeback for him.
Well, he, first of all played his crime, was one of the best quarterbacks coming out there.
He played for the Atlanta Falcons, and then they found out he was dog fighting, so they arrested him.
He went to jail.
This guy.
Like how he should have all that money.
Listen, all that money and you can't get probation or something like that.
You got to go to actual.
Go to jail for two years, like in the prime of his career.
They put him in jail for two years.
They didn't do, like, a dog fight.
He ran a ring.
Okay, so?
Well, bigger crimes.
So you went to jail for dog fighting?
Is he.
Is he suffering?
Is he suffering?
It took two years of his earnings away from him that he could cost him millions of dollars.
I'm just saying.
Don't fucking do dog fights, stupid.
Listen, I'm not saying.
I'm just saying this.
If there was a white Quarterback.
He would have never went to fucking jail for the same thing.
You're right.
White quarterbacks don't go to jail.
Okay, all right, all right.
So anyhow, he gets out of jail, and now he's looking for a team, and the Philadelphia Eagles pick him up.
No, you're a felon.
Come on over to us.
So my kids come out.
I think they were like, I don't know, 10, 11, and 12 at the time.
And they come out and they go, Michael Vicks on the Philadelphia Eagles.
That's it.
We're Dallas Cowboy fans.
I said, that's it.
Go upstairs, pack your bags and get out.
Yeah, get out.
He electrocuted and drowned and beat dogs.
Maybe they deserved it, you know?
Let me just tell you something about electrocuting dogs.
Stop.
I'm telling a story.
When you take hunting dogs out, a lot of times they'll run deer.
You don't want them to run deer because deer will run far away.
They'll run across roads.
The dogs get hit by cars.
So you try to train these dogs not to run deer.
But here's the problem.
Rabbits have, like, a slight smell.
Deer is like a skunk to a dog.
They can smell them.
They can run them with their head up.
And they.
Some dogs love it.
You can't stop them.
Okay, so there's this guy.
What he would do is, if you had a dog that you couldn't break from deer hunting, this is what he would do.
He had a pen, a cage, and had a metal floor.
And what he would do is he put a collar on you.
Didn't go like this at all.
I don't like this.
And he put a collar on.
And then we'd have the dog in there.
And what he would do is he would take a deer gland from the back of the deer's leg that had the scent on it, and he would reel it in there.
And when that dog would come over and sniff, he would throw the juice to it and the dog.
And he kept doing it.
He'd do it for two weeks.
Feed and water.
No one petted him.
And then once.
So then.
That's gross.
Like, after the fourth or fifth day, you would start to run that thing out.
And as soon as the dog started to smell it, smell the deer gland, it would start crying because it knew the current wasn't coming.
And at that point, the guy really turned on the juice.
Now, it's terrible.
It is.
It's awful.
Okay, but here's the thing.
Here's the thing.
It stopped the dog from running Deer.
Because that dog, whenever.
That we were out hunting with this.
Because I know the guy who had the dog, whenever we went out hunting with this guy, if that dog smelled deer, it would run back and stand right next to us.
And we're like.
Cause he was terrified.
Because he was terrified.
That's right.
He wants that dog to be scared to death.
Yes.
And to be honest with you, what we.
What he did was he took a dog that you would end up having to get rid of because it's no good for hunting if it's going to run deer every time it smells a deer, especially in New Jersey.
New Jersey's littered with deer.
And he made it where it was a dog that would actually go out and hunt rabbits.
And the other thing was, you knew if those dogs were running and that dog came back and stood next to you, you knew those assholes were running deer, so you had to go get them.
That being said, it's a training method.
And let me tell you something, rednecks have some great training.
Now, two weeks of electrocuting the dog.
Mm.
Yeah, yeah.
No, I don't like that.
There was another time I had this problem.
I had one dog, her name was Blaze.
She would run a rabbit.
The rabbit went in a hole.
That bitch would never come back.
She would sit there and try to dig that rabbit out.
And you're trying to call the dogs, you can't find the dog.
You can't find the.
The dog.
It won't come back.
Calling, please, please won't come back.
So I'm down in Virginia, and we were at a competition for the dogs, and I said to the guy, what the.
You know, I said, that's.
This one here will hoe a rabbit, and it won't come back out.
I'll try to dig the rabbit out.
He goes, oh, I can fix that.
I said, what do you do?
He says, you get up behind that dog, you see its tail out.
He says, you put your boot.
You shove that dog.
Put your boot on that dog's ass, try to stuff it in a hole.
Just shove it in the hole.
I did that about.
I caught her three or four times that she'd never put.
She would never go in a hole again after a rabbit.
So these are the things that you have to do every once in a while to train a dog.
They're not as smart as us, you know, they just.
They don't get the language.
I know.
It's their nature, though, and it's hard.
You have to train them, and I understand that.
I don't like electrocution.
I had shot collars.
I had shot collars for the dog.
Well, that's.
I'm not a fan of shot collars, but I understand that.
But I don't like in the.
Not socialized in a pen.
I have one dog that's a little creepy.
You'd call her if she didn't want to come to you.
You know, she would keep going.
So I would.
Her name was Ellie.
So I said, ellie, come here.
And she wouldn't.
She wouldn't come.
So I put the shotgar on her.
We're out there, and I call her, and she wouldn't come.
And every time she turned to run, I hit her.
Hit her with the juice.
She'd roll around a little bit.
I let her go and I'd call her.
And then.
And then she wanted to.
And then you know what?
Every once in a while, I call her.
Like, if I sneeze, that dog come out of the wood, you call me.
Because I don't.
Hey, was that.
Sounds like Ellie?
Yeah.
Was that you?
Poor thing.
Thing is so terrified.
Yeah.
So, I mean, these are how you train dogs.
I know the methods.
I'm not.
All right now.
I never took a dog and stuck its head underwater and held head.
It's under.
Held itself.
Oh, my God.
But.
Oh.
One of the things we used to do is in the neighborhood, we'd have.
They would have a box, and they'd have a run, and they'd be out there, and you would yell, get in a box.
Get a box.
And they would run to get in a box.
But if they didn't, you hit them with the hose.
You gave them the hose.
Your kids did that?
By my daughter.
Well, your daughter's like torture, these dogs.
She would say, come here, come here, come here.
She'd go get in a box, and the dogs would run.
She never squirted them, but she would always.
She would play get in a box.
The dogs would go get in a.
Box because the game's funny until you're.
Older and you realize, pet them and all.
Then she'd go get a box, and they'd all scurry back in the box.
Don't shoot us.
Don't squirt us.
I remember one time I had a puppy, and I'm playing get in a box and damn dog, I'm playing get in the box.
I'm trying to.
I'm training the dog to get in the box.
Sounds so dirty.
So now I take the dog, I call the puppy out, and I say, okay.
Get in a box.
And the dog's just sitting there.
So I hit it with the hose.
And now the dog.
And this dog's sitting there, stubborn.
So I'm like.
It was like a fire hose.
That dog's flipping over and all it runs and gets in the box.
And that's how you train them.
I say that.
To say this.
That.
I know it sounds horrible.
Yes, silence the lamb.
I know it sounds horrible, but these are working dogs.
They're not like pets.
All right, so he.
So.
All right, so I get that.
And there was another guy that if you dog ran deer, he tried to train it three times.
He says.
He says, I'll give it three times.
The fourth time the dog runs a deer, he runs it to the Lord.
The guy shoot the dog, shot him right in front of us.
Shot the dog and then picked it up by the tail and threw it in the swamp.
Oh.
Oh, my God.
Yeah.
I'm just saying I never did this, but other guys would do this.
So when you say Michael Vick did all this stuff, did he need to go to jail for two years for that?
I don't know.
So anyhow, he did.
He comes out back to creepy Michael Vick.
He comes back and he's playing for the Eagles.
And, you know, and he's.
And the Eagles were doing well.
We went to a Super bowl with Michael Vick, and they said, I can't believe that you would root for a guy that did this to dogs.
And I said, let me tell you something.
This son of a.
Wins us a Super Bowl.
I don't care if when he scores a touchdown, he picks a puppy up and drowns it in the end zone.
I don't give a.
I want a Super Bowl.
I don't care.
How'd that work for you?
We didn't.
We lost in 2008.
I know, but we got there.
Just saying.
I guess you didn't pray to the.
The right gods so he could go drown some dogs now for you.
Tio sprained.
Had a high ankle sprain and he couldn't.
He tried, but we didn't.
That's right.
We're close.
I forgot about him.
Yeah.
So anyhow, so Eric was talking about Michael Vick, and he got into the face.
Right back to this.
Okay, so he's talking about Michael Vick on Facebook.
How does this guy still be able to be accepted in society?
Because says Eric Zane.
Yeah.
They.
They accept.
Nobody gives a shit.
Yeah.
Michael Vick, who, you know, was mean to dogs, but Colin Kaepernick, all He did was kneel for a cause and he's out of the league and everybody picks their battles.
So one of.
I guess one of his fans said, what about you, Eric?
You sat there and told us all these lies about the COVID vaccine and about COVID And it's been proven now that that vaccine didn't do shit.
And you said, that guy's banned, right?
Eric's like, that's not the same thing.
He says, yeah, it's different.
I gotta write a note down and when I get done here, I gotta go over and ban that guy.
I'm like, you can't.
You can't disagree with Eric, man.
He banned you.
Oh, you're banned by Eric Zane?
Yeah.
Get the band hammer out here.
Banned by Eric Zane?
I mean, seriously.
Well, I have half the people.
If the people in our.
Do I cry about it.
Watch it.
No, it's just funny.
Listen, I don't even think about him.
God, I haven't even thought about him since probably the last time.
Well, I guess since you.
He's now part of our intro.
But I don't think about him at all.
I know he's just pissy because he doesn't have any free burn hot wings money.
So that is true.
He can and moan all he likes and he doesn't have peace of that empire.
I myself at a money way.
He did.
Merry Christmas.
Happy fucking New Year.
How many jobs is he working now?
Like he's like a gypsy.
He's got like.
He's like a Jamaican.
He's got like 15 jobs.
Good for him.
All right, here we go.
Sparky says the QR code took him to McDonald's.
Ah, this one here.
Yes.
Did not.
Liar, liar.
Sparky.
Toaster.
You should get something free if it takes you to McDonald's, you should.
All right, here we go.
Changing the subject now.
This transition sounds are fantastic.
My buddy Vivek Ramaswamy.
Oh, yes.
Got in this favorite yet over this weekend.
He did.
All right, so let's find out what he said.
Here we go.
Why would you have got the H1B visa, which 70% of if is given to Indian people?
I also believe, believe that your company hired employees on this visa.
So why are you turning your back on the Indian community, man?
So I got two questions, two answers for you.
Thank you for the question.
First of all, a lot of the people who have come here through the H1B system would tell you, as I would, that it is just a broken system, no matter who you're seeking to serve.
For example, you want to talk about special interests and lobbying.
This is direct Silicon Valley lobbying.
That said, that if you get your H1B visa and you're hired by one company, you.
You're effectively like a slave.
You can't switch to a different company.
That's not a free labor market.
So there's so much that's broken and bureaucratized.
Here's the next question about the H1B visa system is why the heck do we do it on the basis of a lottery when you could actually just select the very best people?
So there's a lot that's broken about the administrative state, the bureaucracy.
My general approach is when something's broken in government, you can't really fix it.
When it's lasted that long, you need to shut it down, start with the blank slate and rebuild from scratch.
And that's just a stylistic point that I've applied to this issue as to any other.
Let me say a word about immigration policy more generally, though.
You could imagine an immigration system that selects for the smartest people to come to the US you could imagine an immigration system that selects for the ones who are going to work the hardest.
You could imagine an immigration system that selects for those who love the United States or know the most about the United States or speak the best English.
You could imagine any of those, and we could have a debate which of those is the right immigration system to have.
Turns out none of those is the quality that our current immigration system rewards.
If I was to ask you, it would be a hard one for you to guess, but give you a chance, what do you believe is the number one human attribute that our current immigration system actually selects for?
This guy next to me just said nationality.
But I also just wanted to say really quick, I'll give you the answer.
To the question I wrote a book about.
This just came out last.
The number one at that our current U.S.
immigration selects for is your willingness to lie to the US Government.
Because if you're somebody coming from another country and you say that I can't seek asylum, or say I'm seeking asylum because I'm not facing a bodily threat based on my own race or religion, the qualities required for actual seeking asylum, then you don't get in the country.
But if you show up at the southern border and check that box as you're instructed to by the cartels, whether or not you're actually facing that level of persecution, you do get into the country.
So even drawing out of a hat and picking at random is still better than the system that we have right now.
So my view on immigration policy is this.
Make it real simple for you guys.
Think about your nation like your body, okay?
No migration without consent.
Consent should only be granted to migrants who benefit America.
And those who enter without consent must be removed and must be punished.
And I think that those are three fair principles around which to redesign an immigration system.
And number two is important.
If there are immigrants who are going to benefit America, I'm obviously partial to that.
As legal, as a kid of legal immigrants to this country.
If there are benefits.
If there are immigrants who are going to benefit the United States of America, that should be the standard that we actually use.
It just turns out that's not actually the standard we're using today.
Okay?
So white people lost their mind because they said, well, why should we bring over, like, the smartest Indian or the smartest Chinese or the smartest German?
Why don't we just hire an American that can do the same job?
And I'm like, oh, so now Republicans are now for dei and they're like, no, that's not it.
They just bring him over here for cheap labor.
No, that's not what he's saying.
He's saying he wants somebody to come in here.
Here's the problem.
America and white people and Americans in general.
Yeah.
We have become lazy and entitled because Indian people and Asian people, they.
They.
What's the word I'm looking here for?
They.
Education is huge for them.
They want their kids to be educated.
They read books, they go to school, they take, they get, you know, they do their homework, all that stuff.
Education is very important to immigrants.
Yes.
We can't even figure out that you can take a lemon off a fucking tree and eat it.
Okay?
Fucking woman.
We can look at a clock with two hands on it and think that a quarter hours, 25.
Because 25 is quarter of 125.
Yes.
So we.
Our kids are dumb and we're paying a fucking fortune to educate them, and we're not paying attention.
And it all started with this.
The.
What am I thinking here?
I can't even say the word now.
Participation.
Trophies.
It all started with this.
Everybody gets a trophy because they tried.
No, no.
The people that are coming over here.
Listen, when we were at war with Germany, what did we do?
We stole all the Germans that.
All the Nazis that knew how to build rockets and all the Nazis that knew how to build a nuclear bomb.
Yeah.
We're getting crushed by fallen bears out of fucking.
We can't get out of the way of a fallen Fucking bear out of a tree.
The public education, every fucking guy that.
Got crushed by a bear.
White was an American, not a.
Yeah, clearly an American.
Not a brown person, Asian person.
They ain't out there getting, you know.
They understand physics, so.
Right.
We are.
So until we decide that education in this country is of the utmost importance and we educate our children to be the best, this is what's going to happen in this country.
You're going to have people, Asian people, Indian people, the Chinese that take education seriously.
They're gonna come over and take all the top end jobs.
And you guys, you know, us whites, we'll be sitting there, we're gonna be the blue collar people.
Yeah, I'm sorry, put that back up again.
I missed that.
This is from Sparky.
They understand lemon fall down from the branch.
Yeah, yeah.
I mean, again, white people don't like to be told about themselves and they're furious right now.
And I don't see anything wrong with what Vivek said.
In other words, the person that's the most experienced, the person that's best for the job should get the job.
Not just because he American.
I would rather have a listen.
I would rather have a really good Indian pilot than a American pilot that just kind of got by and.
Yeah.
You know that he got a C on everything and he's flying the plane.
He got the.
I showed up.
Yeah.
The name for attendance.
Yeah.
Award.
Yeah.
Mm.
That's what I want.
And everybody's losing their mind.
And I'm like.
I said, I'm like, what did he say that was wrong?
Oh, oh, here we go.
They are smarter.
With less money being thrown at their education system.
They have an ungodly high expectation of work ethic and they work really hard.
Hire the best people, make us better.
Yeah.
You want to listen?
Get in there and compete.
Any job that you do.
When you go out into a.
Into any job, I don't care if you're working at Chipotle, anywhere you go, you can be.
It doesn't take that much effort to get into the top 20% of the people.
I worked in the elevator business.
When I took my mechanics test and I started working, the guy told me, he says you can make it with just a little bit of effort and a hard work ethic and learning your craft.
You can go from the bottom to the top 20% very easily.
But picking off the rest of that to make it from the 20% to the 15 and the 15 and the 10 and the 10 to the 5 and the 5, up to the 1.
Yep.
That's really hard because those guys got their shit together.
Well, those guys are hustling.
Fuddbugger said if you're a sex worker with two vaginas, you should get hired over a woman with only one.
Best for the job.
I guess you're right.
Oh, I don't know that.
Just because she's got two vaginas doesn't mean she's good at her job.
Oh, she might just suck in bed, right?
She could be a raker, you know?
You know, a sex worker, that's a raker.
What's a raker?
You don't know what a raker is?
Well, that means that's good that you don't know what a raker is.
A raker is a woman that uses her teeth during oral sex.
Oh, raker.
Okay, there we go.
How many were DEI s that were working that day in Butler, Pennsylvania?
Secret Service.
D.E.I.
secret Service.
Yeah.
Yeah, exactly.
You want someone.
You want someone that's a.
Like a retired Ranger, Green Beret, Navy Seal.
That's who you want.
Retired.
You want fighting, what I'm saying.
The ones who work at the schools, you want top of the line.
Yeah.
And look at the teachers we get now.
You know, they're all.
They.
They've got the rainbow earrings and the rainbow flag, and they want to teach you about diversity and all this other shit.
Teach them how to fucking spell.
Teach them how to do math.
Teach them the Alphabet.
Teach them how to read.
Teach them how to do fucking math.
Exactly.
Teach them how to read.
A fucking clock, for God's sake.
Not a digital clock.
How about a real clock with hands?
How about teaching them how the government.
The government works because they have no fucking idea.
Everything.
Socialism, right?
You know, Joe Biden just gave $2 billion to Ukraine today.
Stop, stop, stop.
He did.
He didn't.
He doesn't even know where the fuck.
Right.
That's true.
Fucking island.
How did he authorize that?
He didn't.
We need to know who's giving the.
Money away, who's doing that.
If you don't think that money is being laundered and sent right back to these fucking people in Congress, you're out of your fucking brain.
And I'm telling you they're doing this.
They're trying to get as much money over to Ukraine before.
Because they know when.
Tom.
When Trump comes, that should stop.
And it should stop.
If that's what's happening right now.
I want Cash Patel to get into the FBI.
I want investigations, and I want to find out if that's true, and if it is, I want them all fucking arrested.
I want them all perp walked, and I want them out of the government.
No, you can't.
They're all getting pardons.
And I guarantee you when Biden leaves, his brother will be pardoned.
You can be pardoned.
His whole family will.
That's fine.
Pardon them.
It's disgusting.
As soon as this election happened, he should have been.
They should have cut off any opportunity for him to spend any more fucking money.
You can pardon them, but that doesn't mean you can't fire them.
They can't go to jail, but you can fucking fire them.
Well, fire who?
His brother's made plenty of money.
The people in government.
The people that are in government that where this money's come back.
Every once in a while, you'll see a tweet come up and they'll say that money's coming back.
And so.
And so.
And so Democrats and Republican are all getting money that's laundered from Ukraine and slushed back into their.
Of course it is.
How does.
Of course it is.
How is she worth, you know, millions of dollars now?
How is she worth.
What does she do?
I don't know if she's getting Ukraine money, but she's certainly getting money.
She's not working for anybody else.
Backers.
Well, she's got.
I don't know.
I don't know.
She's still doing the whole Palestinian thing.
I don't know where her money's coming from.
All the folks in New York, there's more than that.
The Democrats are pissed now.
There's these people that go out and raise funds for the Democratic Party.
Yeah, they're pissed.
They raised all this fucking money, and now they got to go back to their donors, and they're like, what the fuck happened?
What happened here?
Because nobody's getting paid.
Nobody's getting paid.
Here's one right here.
Could have just paid for the production costs herself.
And not to mention the fact that they spent 450.
$50,000 putting Kamala Harris's face on the sphere.
Now tell me why that would be Vegas.
Tell me how that would help her win.
Obviously, that was utter failure, Lindy.
Well, good morning to you, too, my little geisha.
Oh, my God.
Yeah, I saw your little interview.
In fact, that's why I'm calling.
And, you know, I'm just wondering if you've lost your wontons.
You know, Hillary reached out and she wanted me to ask you if you're sure that, you know what you're doing?
No.
Well, you know, I just don't understand where this is coming from.
You know, we was like sisters.
I know you're still, you know, upset.
Maybe because I fed you collard greens and told you it was seaweed, but, you know, that's.
I mean, that's in the past.
Lindy.
Look, just come back, all right?
Look, I'm broke.
I can't get you much, but what if I could promise you.
What if I could promise you all the leftover sake we got in the White House, the West wing and the East Wing?
Just.
It's all yours.
Take it.
I know.
I got carried away with the spending.
Look, Lindy, we all make mistakes.
We all make mistakes.
I genuinely thought the duality of having the Chinese Communist Party flag tattooed on everyone's ass was just gonna, you know, was just gonna build camaraderie against our union ship.
Look, all right, fine.
I see how it is.
Well, look, I'm gonna have to insist that you return the 24 karat gold plated chopsticks that I gifted to you.
I could pawn them.
I love her.
She is.
I'm glad.
She's still got stuff going on.
Yeah, she's having a good old time.
And you know what?
Wherever Kamala Harris shows up, she's just gonna keep working.
She.
She does a great job with the impersonation.
Really.
But she sounds so much like her.
Sparky says she has the cackling down to a T.
And I think she does.
It's.
It's creepy.
All right, ladies and gentlemen, I don't even.
It's time to get into.
I'm walking here.
I'm walking here.
They made it to the stadium.
We did.
Welcome, Duchess, Matt and Josh.
Hey.
What am I.
I'm still out in the.
Out in the parking lot over here.
That's not right.
Matt's dragging you around.
We've done good, this one.
Mm.
Where's that?
Oh, here.
The graphics are incredible.
2024 miles in 20, 24.
Yep.
All right, thank you, Josh.
These are awesome.
We only have one more day, but since today, we do.
Last day.
Let's get into the.
All right, so here we go.
It's.
Look at.
You guys are tied.
We are.
We.
We.
Josh and I have been neck and neck, I think, the past three, four weeks.
We've been, like, edging each other out.
Like, he gets a little ahead, then I catch up and I, like, get maybe a few miles ahead.
Then it's like he gets 10 more miles.
So he's.
He's Been the challenge the whole way.
And Mr.
Decaf has caught up very quickly with 23, 24 miles dragging you around.
So I'm a bit of a.
I'm a bit of a weight.
Hold them back.
Well, for someone who jumped in con, I don't want to say late to the game, but he did come in a little late.
He caught up pretty quickly.
So he's only like, 100, what, 140 miles from us, which is pretty good.
So for someone who was.
Had a lot going on.
So.
So good on.
Good on.
Matt, when does the 2025 miles in 2020.
2025 miles in 2025 start?
January 1st.
Join 2020.
How much is it driving you insane that you're only 20 miles away from 25?
I can't begin to even tell you.
I know.
So mad that I did not hit 2020, 500, because I thought we could.
And, you know, it's like there was a couple weeks back where I, I don't want to say I slacked, but I, like, just hit my minimum five a day, and I'm like, if I just hit, like, seven, six, or seven miles, I probably could have padded that on.
But, yeah, I'm not, you know what the goal, the Overall goal was 2024 miles, and we eclipsed that, so I'm very happy with it.
And Josh has been a lot of fun to go back and forth with because it's been an absolute challenge to keep up with him because he does, like, crazy Spartan, right?
Like, he does amazing races, and he's always got something going on.
So to be able to keep up, to attempt to keep up with him is.
Is a challenge on my part.
So I, I, I do.
The past two weeks, I've, I've actually done the bike so I can add extra miles on, but most of my miles have been walking or running in 5Ks and stuff like that.
So in my, in my hikes, but a small percentage was with the bike.
Okay.
Did he send a message?
He did, so he has a.
A recap for the year.
So which.
Here we go.
Merry Christmas, Happy Hanukkah, or Happy Kwanzaa for John's biggest fans.
We've had some notable stops as we wrapped up our adventure this month.
In Sacramento, we stopped at the alien tourist trailer attraction looking for old zip die from Zigzag.
Or was it Ziploc from Freezer Burn?
He garbled something about we need more Landman and ending the world if we don't knock off all of this drone shit in San Leandro.
We stopped at the 55 foot tall nude woman sculpture officially titled Truth is Beauty and she glows with thousands of cycling leds at night.
No, John, I didn't check to see if she has an only fans page.
After stopping at the 49ers Lions game tonight, it only makes sense that we will end this journey at the western terminus of the Lincoln highway at the Pacific Coast.
The Lincoln highway was America's first transcontinental road.
When the Duchess proposed this silly thing to me back in January, I had enough rum in me that night to agree to it.
Even with a history of running ultramarathons, I've never even come close to this kind of distance in a calendar year.
I do not get up at 4:30 every morning and bust ass at the gym like she does.
But with a blood alcohol content over the legal limit, I figured maybe, just maybe, I could keep up.
Thanks, Captain Morgan.
To quote John, this broad was 120 miles behind at one point, yet stormed back.
While I can be as competitive and wanted to crush her, it was great that we.
It was great that we all finished at a relatively equal distance.
In the end.
I pulled some strings with the fellows at Levi's Stadium for tonight's game and made sure we had a warm welcome during pregame.
So is you shown the graphics?
Let's see here.
Thank you all for putting up with my poor writing all year long.
Please note that every one of these places have been real.
God help any of you poor souls that travel along this nation's crazy roads.
No wonder we're bonkers as a society.
I know the Duchess and Matt plan on doing 2025 in 2025.
I might join them eventually, but me and these dirty dick beaters are going to hibernate for a bit here in New England.
England.
Have a great time with your family and friends this holiday season.
I'll catch you on Discord and in the show chat.
Go Lions.
Josh from New Hampshire.
Josh, you've been awesome.
Thank you so much for all of these.
It's been fun to watch you guys go through this from afar.
Oh, I'm exhausted.
I would imagine you're not going to stop, so what's the difference?
I'm gonna keep going.
Doesn't matter.
Keeps the crazy back just a little.
So it's been.
It's been fun.
I didn't know if I could do.
It and I did.
I knew you were going to.
I just never thought you were going to catch up to Josh.
I thought he was going to keep.
I Didn't think I would.
I figured he was just going to keep you at a distance.
So before we leave.
Yeah.
So this week coming up, the Philadelphia Eagles are all buzzed.
First of all, they did.
They destroyed the Dallas Cowboys.
Oh, my God, on Sunday.
It was fucking amazing.
And not only did they do it with their second string quarterback, but he got hurt.
They brought the third string court back off there and he threw two fucking touchdowns.
Now I like the third string better than I like Kenny Pickett.
Yes.
I had to get eye surgery and break an ankle for her to catch up.
Okay.
All right.
I'll take it, though, Josh.
I didn't wish for injury on you, though.
I never did.
So here's the deal.
Saquon Barkley passed 2,000 yards.
He needs 106 yards to pass Eric Dickerson.
And Eric Dickerson has been a whiny bitch because he's saying, well, you know, it's not really official.
I did it in 16 games.
He did.
Well, the record he broke, the guy did it in 14 games.
Did anybody say that record wasn't.
All right, so you just stop whining, you little bitch.
But here's the thing.
How many games is Saquon gonna have?
Well, this is the question.
19.
They've locked up the number two seed.
They've won the NFC East.
There's no reason for anybody to play this game.
Do.
Does he go out and try to get 106 yards to break his record?
Now, the fans are like, the fans want it, right?
So there's the two things.
There's a head and the heart.
The head says, we've got a really good chance of making the super bowl this year.
Win another Super Bowl.
We need Saquon Barkley.
Do it.
And we need our team.
And we could rest our team up a week, you know, get.
Let them get better and then, you know, go into the playoffs and then see what happens.
But your heart says, I want this guy.
He's been an amazing running back.
The best running back the Philadelphia Eagles ever had.
Should he go back?
Should he.
Should he take and try to make it the first half?
I say no.
The reason I say no was there was times where they took him out of the game late in the game.
Matter of fact, when he played the Giants, he was just about ready.
He was only a couple yards away from breaking his all time game record.
So Sirianni, the coach walks up to him and says, hey, do you want to go for this?
Because if you want to go for this, I want to get it for you.
And he said, no, let the young dogs.
I saw that.
Yeah.
So there were times where he.
He could have broke this record if he wanted to.
Right.
But you know, he, he thought of the team and I say they continue to think of the team.
Nobody needs to go out there and hurt themselves.
We don't need it.
Last year AJ Brown got hurt and we got smoked in the playoffs.
Yeah, he did.
Do not need this anymore.
Get everybody healthy.
Let's go in.
It looks like we're going to end up playing Washington.
That'll be the third time.
That'll be a good game.
Right.
I think this time though, it'll be different.
Maybe.
Well, we'll have our.
Hopefully we'll have a quarterback.
Yeah.
Listen, I'm going to tell you, I'm going to tell you right now, if we'd have put the third string quarterback in instead of the second string Kenny Pickett in there, we would have won that game against the Commanders.
Can you pick it with his little hands?
Yeah.
Did you see him try to throw the ball one time and it stuck to his.
Like it stuck to his hand and it took him to the ground.
To his credit, which I laughed so hard because you see him go back to pass and it looked like he pulled it back to pass and then fell over like as he went to throw it and like never let go of the ball.
It turns out somebody did hit his hand.
You could see it from a completely different angle.
But before you saw that angle, it looked like he went to throw it and never let it go and then threw himself to the ground like he sacked himself.
I'm like, well, that's Kenny Pickett.
So I laughed really hard when I saw it because I'm like, well, now he's your problem, not mine.
I don't think he's a bad quarterback.
And.
And he was pretty happy when they tush.
Pushed him in, you know, the end zone.
But.
But this kid, he's not the second string.
He's third string.
The third string quarterback, they call him White chop something.
Yeah, whatever.
Tanner MC.
Something.
Tanner McNugget.
McNugget, whatever.
He's pretty good.
He is.
He's really good.
So you see what AJ Brown did.
With his first touchdown?
He threw it in the second deck.
And then he winged it and then he was like, oh, no.
It was the guy's first, first touchdown and he threw the ball away.
So they went to the.
Kudos to the fan for bringing it back.
The fan brought it down and AJ Says, I'll give you my Sign.
So he took this jersey off at the end of the game, signed it and gave it to the guy.
Very cool back.
Yeah, very cool.
So, again, I appreciate.
I appreciate them doing that.
That was very cool.
Because they didn't have to.
Yeah.
So the playoffs will be.
You know, we got one more game.
I don't think there's too many games that even mean anything, to be honest with you, that are even worth.
This is why I don't like this last game.
This last game doesn't mean anything to anybody.
Well, and what the.
For what?
Coming up next.
Yeah.
Versus for the.
Well, it means for us.
Well, we'll see if the Steelers beat the Bengals.
Maybe.
Will that knock you?
Don't you have a playoff birth?
Don't you have a playoff locked up?
We.
Wild card spot?
Yeah.
Yeah.
Okay, so you got a wild card spot.
So even.
Look, even if you win this game, is that going to make you win this division?
Oh, no, we're not winning the division.
All right, so this is three in a row.
Right?
So it doesn't mean anything to you either.
I know.
I just don't want to lose the.
I don't need to lose four in a row.
Doesn't matter if you go into the playoffs, rest everybody, and then come back stronger.
I know.
I don't know.
This is.
This is what I have a problem with the NFL about the game.
Tonight's gonna be good, though.
Who's tonight?
Oh, my God.
Tonight's the 49ers.
It's the lines and Niners.
Yeah, they're playing right now.
Lions gonna maul like Christian.
They're gonna smoke them.
Yeah, exactly.
So how's that gonna be a good game?
I mean, sorry, Bruce, I know you're a Niners fan, but come on, Really?
I understand.
And then the Lions play the Vikings next week.
That's gonna be amazing game.
Next week's lineup games are going to be really good, you know, because they have the Saturday games, which is pretty much.
Which is pretty much my division.
It's Bengals at Steelers and then the Browns at the Ravens.
And the Ravens are gonna smoke the Browns.
And then Sunday, Cowboys are playing the Commanders.
Commanders will kill them.
Vikings, Lions, Titans, Texans.
Vikings.
Lions is a game.
That's a game that means something.
I'm sorry, I'm wrong.
Because that game is for the.
That's for the number one seed division and the number one seed.
Whoever wins that gets the number one seed.
Yeah, it was a bummer because if Green Bay had beat the Vikings last yesterday, the Vikings would have Dropped down.
That would put the lines in the number one spot.
Oh, yeah.
It would have bumped them out, but they.
That didn't happen.
And then I think the only other game that I'm gonna want, the Bills are playing the Patriots.
Who cares?
Come on.
Yeah, well, I'm.
I'm just enjoying Josh Allen beating the.
Out of people.
The Giants play the Eagles.
Why?
Why?
Yeah, exactly.
That's going to be such a lame.
Well, the other thing too is if.
Let's say you put Broncos, if you.
Put everybody out there and the Giants, they have nothing to lose.
What if they decide to take out somebody's needs or something just to be.
You know what I'm saying?
They can.
Yeah, they can.
They have.
There's nothing to play for.
And then you're going to break the record and, you know, against them after they ended up losing you.
I don't think that's going to happen.
I say don't play them.
I really don't want them to play them, which means they'll play them.
So.
Yeah.
So it should be interesting.
So.
So in other news, I may need you to find a guest co host for one night.
Which.
Which night's this?
It may need to be in January.
In fact, I can give you the date if you'd like to reach out because I know some of you it's going to be Thursday the 23rd.
All right.
I need to get a co host.
Why?
Where are you going?
I managed to snag a very cheap flight to Florida and I'm going to meet up with a girlfriend that I have not seen in 20 plus years.
Okay.
And I'm very excited about that.
So she lives near Tampa.
So we're gonna.
I'm gonna quick fly down and it's gonna be the weekend of the NFC AFC championships.
And I'm like, oh, no.
So I'm gonna have to be like glued to the television on Sunday, like.
In Florida with your friend.
You're gonna be watching tv.
Hey, I can't.
I can't believe I haven't seen you in 20 years.
Can we watch football all day Sunday?
Oh, my God.
Ridiculous.
I understand it, but it's ridiculous.
Now I do fly back on Monday.
So I need to get two people.
Listen, I'll be honest.
No, I should be home.
I should be home for.
I gotta be honest with you, that Thursday I'm taking off.
Whatever it is.
It's the curse of the Duchess.
You wanted to do Aaron.
Get Aaron.
Here's the deal.
And I'm serious about this.
For some Reason.
There is some kind of curse that when you don't go here, I have all kinds of fucking problems.
And I can reach out to ez.
He might co host.
Past his fucking bedtime.
Besides that, I.
He's a bitch.
We would.
We would have such arguments here.
I would.
He wouldn't do it.
I would do it.
I would have him on as a co host in a heartbeat.
I would.
But he won't do it.
He's too chicken.
Get a Ron Aaron.
All right, I'll talk to him.
Yeah.
How many times have I done this before?
And it just.
You've never asked.
Aaron, you had said.
I know.
I would like to have said I would.
You're right.
I would.
It would be.
Be careful what you wish for.
You might go back and not have a job.
No, I'd be sad.
You'd be on in the mornings with Bruce.
I get on with Bruce.
I don't know.
Between me and Aaron, I think we would both have an annual.
One of us would drop dead of a heart attack by the time we get screaming, like, Jimmy Carter.
RIP.
Jimmy Carter.
Oh, what the hell?
He's 100 years old.
A terrible president.
He should have died.
He had a good run.
He really did.
Yeah.
Seven, eight years ago.
This.
I'll be honest with you.
This is where I think that we are.
Picture they had him, like, out in the field, like, waiting to vote, like, just with his mouth open and.
And all that.
I'll be honest with you.
This is our flaw as a.
As.
As a species, that we don't put people down when they're that far along.
Bruce would be way too happy to have you to himself.
Yeah, I know the fighting that would go on over Duchess.
Has she ever left here?
No, there's no fighting.
There really isn't.
There is no fighting.
Nobody's fighting.
All right, well, we will be back here, Sparky.
John first.
I couldn't.
I couldn't do it with Tom.
He's just such a.
He's such a naysayer.
I can't.
He's.
Wow.
Never seen anything like it.
Can't with you.
I can't with you.
It's a shame because the guy possibly could be trained, but I.
I would need a metal cage and a zapper.
Oh, like your beagles.
Like.
Yeah, get in the box.
Get the shock him into.
Into shape.
I'm serious.
I'm so sorry, Tom.
What was that, Tom?
It was screaming there.
Say again?
I'm sorry, Tom.
That's what I thought.
Oh, my goodness.
All right, everybody.
We're gonna get out of here.
I was going to play the music at the end, but what happens is it's too loud and then we scream over it and it sounds stupid at the end.
Yell over it.
I'll put that in post.
That will add in post.
So you'll have to download it to hear it.
Yes, download our podcast.
Right.
For sure.
And you know what?
It wouldn't kill you to use the damn line and call in and send us a text.
No text, no voicemail, no nothing.
Week three, Week four Text.
Ridiculous.
How dare you.
All this content we give you.
All this entertainment.
You can't even berate us over the text line.
Or can't even insult me or say nice things.
Or say nice things.
No, tell us how wonderful we are.
No, just insult us.
I don't give a.
All right.
Tell me how wonderful I am.
Duchess can't handle the criticism.
I can.
Sparky says, damn kids.
Never call.
Never call.
Never call.
All right, everybody, Happy New Year, and we'll talk to you Thursday.
Bye.
Bye.
You always got a giggle.
I can't help it.
I hope that's going to stay in.
Oh, no, it's definitely going to stay in.